Behold Your Mother-A short Reflection on Bl.Virgin Mary

 Behold Your Mother

Ecce Mater Tua

(Thava Matharam Pasya)

One of the most poignant moments of Jesus' Crucifixion is the profound outpouring of love and compassion He shows for His beloved Mother, who stands at the foot of the cross. Her mournful eyes and sorrow-laden heart, bleeding with indescribable grief, bear silent witness to the excruciating pain of her Son's suffering.

In this moment of unimaginable agony, Jesus sees beyond His pain to the depth of her anguish—her lonely, broken heart weighed down by unbearable sorrow. She, who cradled Him in His infancy, searched for Him in the Temple and accompanied Him silently in His ministry, now stands helpless before the cross. Her love, care, and unwavering faith had always been with Him, and now, in her darkest hour, Jesus' heart is moved with immeasurable love for her.

He does not leave her abandoned in her grief. She, who once heard from the angel that she was "full of grace" and would bear the Son of the Most High, now faces the agony of seeing that same Son in His final moments. In His infinite compassion, Jesus entrusts her to the care of His beloved disciple, ensuring she would not face the trials ahead alone.

With just three powerful words, He provides for her, offering reassurance that she will be cherished and protected. This act reflects not only His love for His Mother but also the enduring bond between heaven and earth.

The disciple, who grasped the profound mystery of the Incarnation and proclaimed to the world that "God is love," becomes the one to care for the Mother of God. William Wordsworth aptly describes her as "our tainted nature’s solitary boast," highlighting her unique role in salvation history.

 

Fr.George Madathiparampil--New Address

 

The New Address:(2024)

Fr. George Madathiparampil

Mother Theresa Lane

Old Railway Station Rd

House No.42,

Kochi-682018, Kerala,India

Cell:9744576243

georgemparampil@yahoo.com

madathiparampil. blogspot.com

Offices Held:

Formerly

Principal, S.B.College,Changanacherry

President, AIACHE, New Delhi, India

Vicar General, St.Thomas Diocese, Chicago

Secretary, Higher Education, Syro-Malabar Church

Jt.Secretary, Inter-Church Council, Kerala

St.Andrew, The Silent Evangelizer

                                 St.Andrew-The Silent Evangelizer

 

There is a custom in American Catholic dioceses of celebrating St. Andrew's Day when the parish priests introduce candidates who have shown interest in becoming priests to the bishop of their dioceses. This is a time for the candidates and their families to get acquainted with the bishop and the ministry to which they are open. It all comes from the work of St. Andrew the Apostle who in the Scriptures has brought many to Jesus. He was a silent evangelizer. Not through shout or preaching but through his friendship and social skills he brought people to Jesus.

St.Andrew(in Gk: manly . valorous) is known as the” First Called”, and “the Protoclete” in the Orthodox Church. He was the one who identified the boy with five loaves in the great miracle of Jesus feeding the five thousand. He was the one who brought Philip to Jesus as well as the Greeks to Him just before his passion. Silently and steadily, he worked behind the scenes to bring people to Jesus, offering them to experience the life and the person of Jesus.

Robert Frost has a beautiful poem,   "The Road Not Taken " about the choice one makes in life. The poet is confronted with a choice to take the trodden path or the untrodden one covered with grass and broken branches of trees. He took the untrodden path and that has made a difference in his life. So too one who accepts the vocation to ministries is treading the untrodden path. St. Andrew becomes the guide and mentor of people who choose untrodden paths.

It is very opportune to reflect on the following words of Abp. Sheen when we celebrate the martyrdom of St.Andrew: “The barbarism of the new era will not be like that of the Huns of old; it will be technical, scientific, secular and propagandized. It will come not from without, but from within, for barbarism is not outside of us; it is underneath us. Older civilizations were destroyed by imported barbarism; modern civilization breeds its own.” Abp.Sheen tellls us through these words how necessary it is for us to live a life according to our faith. If we are unfaithful to Jesus ,Our Lord, it will be a reason for others to avoid meeting the comforting message of Jesus.

We are too much engrossed in administration and in the exercise of authority and power. We often forget our mission as Christians. We forget to convey the love and compassion of Jesus. Jesus came to forgive our sins and offer His love. He wants us to know  that God is love and he never tires of offering  forgiveness. The sinners and derelicts find a place in his banquet. But looking at the way we live and the way we exercise authority, one doesn't find Christ in our midst. That is why Pope Francis reminds us that the Church is a healing place, a field hospital. The rules and rituals we create and the obedience we demand from the people keep Jesus away from them.

The martyrdom of Andrew took place during the reign of Nero on the 30th Nov, AD 60. Both the Latin and the Greek Churches observe Nov.30 as his Feast.

In 1460 his head was given to the Pope. On 24th Sept.1964, his head was returned to Greece. He was martyred in Greece on a cross shaped like an  X.

Prayers of Nouwen

 

Lord, give me faith, faith in your endless mercy, your boundless forgiveness, your unfathomable goodness.

Let me not be tempted to think that my sins are too great to be forgiven, too abominable to be touched by your mercy….Let me never run away from you...Take me under your wings, O  Lord. Perhaps my doubt in your forgiveness is a greater sin than the sins I consider too great to be forgiven,.. Lord, look at me, accept my prayer as you accepted Peter’s prayer.

 

Dear Lord, show me your kindness and your gentleness, you who are meek and humble of heart.

The fact that I get so easily upset because of a disappointment, so easily angered because of a slight criticism, and so easily depressed because of slight rejection, shows that your love does not fill me….

What can people do to me when I know that you love, care for, protect, defend, guide, and support me? What does a small -or even a great failure mean, when I know you are with me in all my sorrows and turmoil? Yet time and again,  I have to confess that I have not let your love descend fully from my mind into my heart.

God’s mercy is greater than our sins.  There is an awareness of sin that does not lead to God but to self-preoccupation. Our temptation is to be so impressed by our sins and failings and so overwhelmed by our lack of generosity that we get stuck in a paralyzing guilt.It is the guilt that says, “ I am too sinful to deserve God’s mercy. It is the guilt that has become an idol and therefore a form of pride. 

Lent is the time to break down this idol. Are we like Judas who did not repent or like Peter who repented?

Dear Lord, thank you for the beginning of spring. In the midst of Lent, I am made aware that Easter is coming again. The days are getting longer, the snow is fading, and the sun is bringing new warmth.

Anyone who drinks the water I give...what words… the water that you give turns into a spring. Therefore, I do not have to be stingy with your gift, O Lord. I can freely let the water come from my center and let anyone who desires drink from it.

Let the spring of this year and the spring of water in me give me joy.

Listen, Lord, to my prayers. Listen to my desire to be with you,to dwell in your house and to let my whole being filled with your presence.But none of this is possible without you. When you are not the one who fills me I am soon filled with endless thoughts and concerns that divide me and tear me away from you.

Every day I see again that only you can teach me to pray, only you can set my heart at rest, only you can let me dwell in your presence.

Lord,let me at least remain open to your initiative, let me wait patiently and attentively for that hour when you will come and break through all the walls I have erected.Teach me Lord to pray.

O Lord, let me praise you,bless you,worship you. So, often my prayer turns into introspective ruminations regarding my own confused feelings and emotions. You are the source of all goodness beauty and love. You have shown me your mercy by coming to me and lifting me up into your own life through the life of your Church.

Lord, let me understand that in and through you all my little concerns will be taken care of.

p.43)

O Lord, grant me a pure heart so that I can see You and hear you in the splendor of the holy liturgy.

My heart is not pure. I am filled with morbid introspection. Lord, I really want to see

but my struggle to come to any degree of purity of heart seems so futile...take me by the hand and lead me to the top of the mountain. Purify my heart and show me your light.

You are my lord,Lord of my heart,mind and soul. You know me through and through. You embrace all that exists and care for it with divine love….why do I keep looking for popularity,respect from others,success,acclaim, and sensual pleasures.

Help me Lord to let my old self die, to let die the thousand big and small ways in which I am still building up my false self and trying to cling to my false desires.

You alone can reach out to me and save me.

Thank you Lord for every day that you give me to come closer to you.Thank you for your patience and goodness.

Come,Lord Jesus,come.do not just come to our understanding,but enter our hearts---our passions,emotions and feelings and reveal your presence  to us in our inmost being.

p.66

Dear Lord, show me your kindness and gentleness. What does a small or even a great failure mean,when I know that you are with me in all my sorrows and turmoil. Yet time and again I have to confess that I have not let your love descend fully from my mind into my heart…

p.68

o Lord, your abundant love became visible today in the abundant beauty of nature. Refers to his mother’s death who was always fascinated by the spring.

I believe that her death will yield fruits.The day of your resurrection for which I am preparing  myself is also a sign that there is hope for all who die. So let my sadness be a sorrow that makes me eager to follow you on the way to the cross and beyond it, to that easter morning with its empty grave.

p.74

Dear Lord,help me keep my eyes on you.You are the incarnation of divine love,you are the expression of God’s infinite compassion.

 

you are beauty,goodness,gentleness,forgiveness and mercy.In you all can be found.why should elsewhere or go elsewhere/you have the words of eternal life.You are the light that shines in darkness,the lamp on the lamp stand, the house on the hilltop.

To you I want to give all that I am.let me be generous, not stingy otrhesitant.Let me give you all –all I have ,think,do and feel.Please accept it and make it fully your own.

 

 

Priestly Life

 Priestly life:

 Many people question the relevance of priesthood. Some people hold that the whole concept of priesthood is a sham and a fraud. Many are offended by the discourteous or uncouth behaviour of some priests. They did not find in these priests the gentlemanliness, courtesy, or compassion they expected from people who represented Christ. There are indeed some priests whose behaviour is atrocious and they appear not to have been transformed by the Gospels' message. They do not represent the vast majority of the priests who reflect the compassion and understanding of Jesus in their lives. His closeness to Jesus and his daily striving to be close to Him sustain a priest in his life..

  What Jesus said about himself as the Way, the Life, and the Truth gives us strength and confidence to handle our problems. If we put our trust in Him, nothing can destroy us or take away our inner freedom, peace, or joy.

The following reflections on the priesthood by Fr. Peter Stravinskas in his book “Be to Me a Father and a Priest” are found to be relevant in the discussion of priesthood in today’s world,

“His(Priest’s) is a divine commission to teach the tremendous mystery of God’s love to all men. We have at our disposal today the most advanced techniques of communication, the most nuanced understanding of learning theory, and most carefully researched methodologies….So, Fathers, like Christ, we must “be about our Father’s business.”

 According to Henri Nouwen, priests are “wounded healers”. We have our sins and failures. We need mercy in our lives. No one is perfect. Even the very thought that we are perfect and haven’t committed any sin is a sign of arrogance. Archbishop Sheen’s words to a person who asked him how he could establish rapport with prisoners when he goes to prisons to visit them are worth paying attention to. He said, he would say to them,  “Only thing is that I was not caught but you were caught. There go I but for the grace of God.”

We are all in the same boat. We carry our sins with us. We should be merciful and compassionate.

Fr. Peter Stravinskas mentions the following as the qualities required for priests in today’s age:

Courage of conviction, confidence, enthusiasm, joy, prayer and scholarship, prudence, class, and courtesy.

 The other traditional qualifications are presumed: prayer life, commitment to our promises of obedience, and chastity.

Pope Benedict speaks of a deficiency among modern Christians which he calls “Negative Tolerance.”

Confidence consists in knowing who you are and what you have to offer. Self-confidence is not arrogance.

Enthusiasm means that you should have fire in the belly.

Joy consists in seeing everything under the lens of eternity—seeing everything in the perspective of eternity.

Scholarship is Intellectual self-improvement

Prudence is doing the right thing under the right circumstances.

Class shows the way we talk, dress, and walk.

 

Nathaniel, the symbol of modern man

 Nathaniel (meaning "Gift of God" or "Giving of God" in Hebrew, and identified as Bartholomew the Apostle) was astonished by the way Jesus greeted him upon first sight, calling him "an Israelite in whom there is no deceit." Although Nathaniel initially doubted Philip, claiming that no prophet could come from the insignificant town of Nazareth, he soon found himself drawn to Jesus by His unexpected affection and understanding.

In His greeting, Jesus captured Nathaniel's entire personality, recognizing him as a person without malice. Nathaniel’s sincerity, openness, curiosity to learn, humility, lack of prejudice, and deep understanding of the Scriptures were all encapsulated in that greeting. Nathaniel was astonished by Jesus’ knowledge of his inner thoughts and reflections, unraveled with just a few words. Sitting under the fig tree—a term used to describe the meditative study of the Scriptures—signified Nathaniel’s contemplative nature. Jesus revealed that He understood the perplexities and ambiguities that weighed upon Nathaniel’s heart. Nathaniel immediately realized he was in the presence of none other than the Son of God.

Nathaniel represents every disciple who encounters Jesus personally. All confusion and doubt vanish when Jesus enters one's life. Like St. Paul, such a disciple would declare, “Who can separate me from the Lord?” Nathaniel also symbolizes those in today’s world who are bewildered by various ideologies and perspectives. Amidst conflicting viewpoints, stability and peace are found in Christ.

In Shakespearean criticism, Hamlet,  the Prince of Denmark, is often seen as a figure representing the modern individual, grappling with ambiguity and confusion—emotions expressed in his famous soliloquy, “To be or not to be.” Thomas Merton, similarly, found himself caught in a web of conflicting ideologies. Yet, when Jesus touched his life, he abandoned the conveniences of modern life for the seclusion of a monastery, where he encountered Christ in all creation: “The trees indeed love You without knowing You. The tiger lilies and cornflowers proclaim their love for You, unaware of Your presence. The dark clouds drift slowly across the sky, musing on You as children who play, unaware of their dreams... yet in their midst, I know You and know Your presence.”

Nathaniel invites each of us who have encountered Jesus personally to say with conviction, “Rabbi, You are the Son of God, the King of Israel.”

 

Zacchaeus: A Symbol of Repentance and Hospitality

 Zacchaeus: A Symbol of Repentance and Hospitality

Zacchaeus(Pure, Innocent in Hebrew) stands as a lasting beacon of hope, symbolizing repentance and hospitality. His name is often invoked in our prayers for home blessings, as Jesus chose to stay with him, transforming his house into a place of grace. Jesus recognized Zacchaeus’s genuine desire to encounter Him—manifested by his climb up a sycamore tree despite his small stature. Through this act, Zacchaeus displayed his repentance, humility, and willingness to serve Jesus's mission. He wasn’t content with merely a partial glimpse of Jesus but sought a full, direct encounter. Jesus’s response was immediate: He called Zacchaeus down from the tree and announced His intention to stay at his home. Overjoyed, Zacchaeus offered to repay everything he had taken and to give fourfold of what he had extorted. This transformation occurred simply because of Jesus's presence, free of criticism or condemnation. Jesus accepted Zacchaeus as he was, with all his faults and burdens.

Zacchaeus reminds us of the transformation that must take place when we welcome Jesus into our lives. We cannot remain trapped in pride and arrogance but must step down from our pedestals, making ourselves available to others. This transformation involves reparation, humility, and the removal of grudges and resentment from our hearts.

Reflecting on this transformation, Cardinal Dolan, in his book Priests of the Third Millennium, offers guidance to priests. Drawing from his experiences as the Rector of the North American College in Rome, he writes, “Grace builds on nature. We supply raw materials for God’s amazing grace. Priests are to be bridge-builders. Our manner, our style, and our personality are to attract people—not to shock, scare, hurt, or alienate them. What good will the prayer and learning be for the priest whose personality repels people?”

What is often missing in our actions is simple courtesy and humility. Our spiritual calling should not elevate us to arrogance or a sense of superiority. Jesus’s example at the Last Supper reminds us that our ministry is rooted in service, in washing the feet of our neighbors. Like Zacchaeus, we can only achieve generosity and a broad-minded spirit through true repentance and humility.

Nicodemus, a model for openness and re-awakening

 Nicodemus(Etymology: the people's victory in Gk and Nahum in Hebrew) appears three times in the Gospel of St. John. As St. John describes, he was a scholar among the Jews of that time, yet deeply perplexed by Jesus’ teachings on rebirth. Wanting to understand more, Nicodemus sought Jesus out, though he came under the cover of night, fearing to appear in public. During their conversation, Jesus clarified that the rebirth He spoke of was not a second physical birth, as Nicodemus initially thought, but rather a spiritual rebirth—one whose effects would be visible in a transformed life. This explanation resonated with Nicodemus, and it began his journey of spiritual transformation.

Later, Nicodemus interceded with the Pharisees, arguing that Jesus should not be condemned without being heard. Eventually, he displayed no fear in identifying as a follower of Christ. When Jesus was crucified, Nicodemus publicly honored Him by bringing spices for His burial, an act of reverence and devotion.

What stands out is the spiritual transformation that took place in Nicodemus through his openness to learning and his willingness to break free from rigid traditions. His enlightenment came from Jesus Himself, the source of ultimate truth. Nicodemus symbolizes the openness and unprejudiced pursuit of knowledge that education and spiritual growth bring. He was fortunate to receive his formation from Christ, and his life reminds us that we should not remain confined within the limits of what we’ve already learned. Instead, we should be constantly expanding our understanding, seeking deeper insights into our faith.

Like Nicodemus, we are called to articulate what we believe clearly and logically to those who seek to understand our faith. In this way, Nicodemus is a model for intellectual curiosity and spiritual openness.

Similarly, Cardinal Newman exemplifies the ideal of a seeker. Unsatisfied with what he had absorbed, he sought deeper knowledge about his faith, its roots, and its authenticity. His prayer to the Light to guide his way came from his heart, and through further study and inquiry, he grew in his understanding of the faith. Newman was willing to give up positions and privileges to pursue the truth he found. His words capture this sense of purpose:

"God has created me to do Him some definite service; He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission; I never may know it in this life, but I shall be told it in the next. I have a part in a great work; I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons. He has not created me for naught. I shall do good, I shall do His work; I shall be an angel of peace, a preacher of truth in my place, while not intending it, if I do but keep His commandments and serve Him in my calling."

In our own journey, we too should use our time and resources to deepen our knowledge of the faith and understanding of our attachment to Jesus. This requires constant study and an open mind. As Tennyson’s Ulysses declares, our aim should be “to strive, to seek, to find.” Nicodemus, in this sense, becomes a mentor and guiding star for us as we pursue greater understanding and spiritual growth.

Pastoral Leadership

 Pastoral Leadership

In his book Leadership in the Church, Cardinal Walter Kasper reflects on the essence of priestly life. He emphasizes that the significance of a priest lies not in his contributions to the institutional structure of the Church, but in how he reflects the love and compassion of Jesus through his life. Kasper states, “There is nothing for us to make... all we can do is to offer ourselves for the purpose of representation. Priestly existence is existence as a witness and as a sign, not only with our lips, but with the whole of our existence.” According to him, it is not material accomplishments that matter, but how a priest embodies Christ in his daily life.

This idea finds resonance even in secular fields. Harvard Professor Clayton M. Christensen, in discussing leadership and fulfillment, echoes a similar sentiment: “What provides happiness in our careers is not money; it is the opportunity to learn, grow in responsibilities that contribute to others, and be recognized for achievements... the metric by which God will assess my life is not dollars but the individual people whose lives I have touched.” For Christensen, the desire to care for people is the hallmark of a good and effective leader. It’s not about amassing wealth but about how one has impacted and cared for others.

One exemplary figure of this principle is the late industrial leader Ratan Tata, who demonstrated profound care for the well-being of others. During the aftermath of the tragic Taj Hotel attack in Mumbai, Tata extended financial support to the family of one of his managers who lost his life. He provided educational assistance to the children, offered a job to the widow, and continued to send the family the same salary the husband had earned. This is a reflection of true leadership—concern for people over profit.

This is precisely what Jesus asks of his followers: to serve others. He teaches us to wash the feet of others, as He did for His disciples. Jesus clearly stated that He came to serve, not to be served. This has inspired a management style known as Servant Leadership, rooted in His teachings. Through the parable of the Good Shepherd, Jesus illustrated what it means to lead a community: a leader must be protective, compassionate, and committed to the holistic development of those in their care, always seeking out the lost.

As leaders in the Church, parents, teachers, and religious figures, we are called to live by Jesus's teachings. Our preaching is not limited to words but also conveys the silent testimony of lives lived according to Gospel values. The words of St. John Chrysostom, spoken centuries ago, remain relevant today: “If you don’t see the beggar at the Church door, you cannot find Christ in the Chalice.”

Instead of engaging in quarrels, whether among different denominations or within our Church, we should focus on living out the teachings of Christ. These disputes do little to advance our Christian witness. Our attention should be on the urgent task of building our lives according to Christ’s example, for the time given to us is brief.

 

Reflections on my Priestly Life

 As I reach the twilight of my life, I find myself reflecting on my 56 years as a priest. Throughout this journey, I have never doubted my calling. My love for Jesus deeply influenced my decision to pursue the priesthood, as it allowed me to be close to Him and feel His presence in my life.

When it came time to choose between joining the Jesuit order—whose priests had been my teachers in high school—and the diocesan priesthood, I was drawn to the flexibility and freedom that the latter provided. The influence of Archbishop Mar Mathew Kavukattu has been profound in my life. I still remember receiving the first Catechism prize from him during middle school.

One of my most vivid memories is my first meeting with him after my SSLC results were announced. I brought him my certificate, proudly placed in the first class, one of only four in Alleppey schools then. He expressed amazement at my marks in English. Although I didn’t meet him often, I sensed his genuine support for me. After my B.Sc. results, I had the opportunity to visit him at the Bishop’s house, where he invited me to lunch and spoke highly of my academic achievements.

Later, during my first year in Theology, he inquired whether I would be interested in pursuing higher studies in Rome, though the conversation ended with my concerns about family expenses. After my ordination, he didn’t assign me to a parish immediately but instead encouraged me to pursue an MA in English at S.B. College, assuring me that a position would be available by the time I completed my studies. His thoughtfulness and compassion have left a lasting impact on me, and I have never regretted the path he charted for me.

Unfortunately, shortly into my postgraduate studies, he passed away, leaving a significant void in the Church’s leadership. The days of great leaders like Mar Mathew Kavukattu seem to have faded, and it’s disheartening to witness others of lesser intellectual and spiritual caliber occupying those positions.

At the outset of my priesthood, I promised to preach only the love of Jesus. For me, the sermon during Mass is a sacred moment to represent Jesus and interpret His words for the congregation, allowing them to feel His love. I am grateful that people have recognized this central theme in my sermons, whether in the U.S. or Kerala, and I thank the Lord for the opportunity to speak for Him.

I am aware of my shortcomings and rely on the kindness and mercy of the Lord. In recent years, the turmoil surrounding the Synodal decision to implement a uniform mode of Eucharistic celebration has distracted the focus of the Syro-Malabar Church. Some priests’ actions have brought derision and contempt upon the clergy. What could have been resolved through dialogue and education instead became a source of division. It was misguided for leadership to rush into a situation they knew would provoke strong reactions. Older priests are more aware of the conflicting views regarding the new Eucharistic celebration, as two opposing liturgical teachings have been perpetuated in major seminaries. If unanimity were the goal, these divergent teachings should have been addressed long ago.

We often speak of dialogue, discussions, and synodality in our preaching, yet these ideals seem to vanish in practice. There is no real dispute regarding doctrine or the essence of the Catholic faith; rather, the current issues stem from a troubling mix of low-mindedness and hubris, masquerading as spiritual obedience.

As a result, the Church finds itself in a precarious position, with vital matters being overlooked. The Church should lead in providing aid to the sick and disadvantaged while countering negative portrayals in social and entertainment media. Unfortunately, we are failing to inspire our youth, who are drifting away from the Church. Our leaders often lack inspiration, relying on uninspired rhetoric instead of profound insight. We find ourselves guided by average individuals who depend on superficial statements rather than eloquent discourse.

The Syro-Malabar Church and its initiatives have significantly transformed society. Through dedication and sacrifice, we have built a culture that uplifts individuals, irrespective of caste or religion. Our educational institutions, orphanages, and homes for the disabled have empowered thousands to realize their potential. Yet, these critical aspects of the Church are now overlooked in favor of an illusory sense of unity. Even the Holy Father has been drawn into this troubling situation and made a target of ridicule.

I am left wondering why there is no strong leadership within the Church to put an end to this disarray.

 

Prof.Sivasankaran Nair

 Prof. Sivasnkaran Nair passed away a couple of days ago and his body was cremated in his courtyard.I wrote a short note on him in the teacher's whats up but it disappeared. I have to recollect what I wrote on him.It was early in the morning on Monday that I saw the news of his demise.Immediately after that I jotted down a few of my recollections of his life and work.

He was the epitome of gentlemanliness and scholarship. Never a word out of place or disrespectful would come from him.Always pleasant and gentle, he greeted everyone with a smile.I was  a student of his in B.Sc physics and his classes for us were on the various theories  regarding heat and light.The Department of Physics at SB was a formidable faculty with great techers like Prof.S.L.Thomas, Prof.K.V.John,Prof.Rao and Prof.K.K.John.They were all eloquent and scholarly and could explain the intricate theories and problems in Physics with great ease and flexibility. Prof.Sivasankaran Nair later became the Head of the Dept after the retirement of Prof.S.L.Thomas.He was elegant and scholarly and students were very much appreciative of his guidance and scholarship.May God grant him eternal rest.

I always wanted to visit him during his retirement years but did not get the chance although he was living at Perunna , not very far from the college.

Fr.Ettoli

 I felt despondent when I received the news of the passing away of Fr. Ettolil. I felt really shocked because it was a few months ago that I met him at Ponkunnam church where he was staying as a resident. I had no idea that he would be there but seeing him there made me very happy. We spent some time regaling ourselves with the stories of our past seminary life. We were together in the Minor Seminary at Parel when we were doing our studies at SB. He was a year senior to me and his degree was in economics. After his ordination and after a few stints at some of the parishes in Changanacherry, he was selected for studies at Louvain University. After spending a couple of years there he moved to NY. When I arrived in NY on Dec.29,1976, he was there at JFK to receive me along with Fr. Jose Alencherry and Fr. Mathew Muthuplakal. Then, I went to his place in Nyack, NY, and spent the New Year with him, taking part in the dance party of the parish. I saw his parishioners' love for him as many were calling him, Tom, Tom, and found joy in speaking to him. Then, he took me to the airport on my continued flight to Indianapolis. In fact, I spent my first days in the US with him. We maintained contact with each other during the time I was in Indiana. Once when he was going on vacation in Canada, he called me and asked whether he should try for my admission to a Ph.D. program at a Canadian university. He was always smiling and cordial. His pleasant manners drew a lot of people to him. Even though I didn't have any contact with him after my return from the US, there was always a warm-hearted feeling for him.

God bless him and give him eternal rest. He is in heaven enjoying the unbounded happiness that Our Lord is giving him. He was a faithful servant and he gets all the benefits of his good service for the Lord in heaven.

Fr.Thuruthel

 The funeral of Fr .Thuruthel is taking place today, Feb.12,24.Many bishops who were his students are celebrating the mass in the presence of Cardinal Mar George Alencherry.I went there yesterday to say the office for the dead when his body was brought to the auditorium.Fr.Siju Azhakathil guided me when I reached the Deepti House.Frs. Joby and Joseph Pulively too joined us in  the prayers. We left the place after coffee and snacks. They were very courteous and full of warm and cordial feelings. 

I felt honored and respected by their cordial and warm hospitality. Fr.Siju was with me all the time I was there and I felt very happy because of the way he received me and introduced me to the priests there.

Fr. Thurthel was one of our teachers at the seminary. He taught us English at Carmelgiri. The classes were superfluous for us who came as graduates. We were sitting in a class where the majority of the students did not have the chance to receive a college education. After having had so many years of instruction under Prof.Sheppard and Prof. A.E. Augustine with lots of classes in  English poetry and drama, we didn't need to sit through the classes in English at the Seminary. But Fr. Thuruthel was very gentlemanly and courteous.  His sense of humor, acts of courtesy, etc were unforgettable. May God bless him and give him eternal peace. He led a long life of retirement and had enough time to spend with God. His life should be a  model for every priest. I too should spend my time with the Lord. I don't have to worry about acquiring more knowledge. What is needed is the purification of my life, fasting, and almsgiving.

Thanks 47

 Thank you-47

Dec.7,23

Lord, I thank you for this day. You kept me safe and healthy and preserved me from negativity and despairing thoughts. I thank you and praise you for your help and blessings. You gave me everything I needed and desired: Teaching, higher studies, a long stay in the US, helping other people, helping me to overcome my failings. Lord, you have blessed me abundantly.

Today is an important day. The MABP  will announce the news of his resignation in a press meeting today.

It is sad to see how his ministry has run short. He came with a great promise.  God bless him. May God give him the strength to handle the crisis. He is at peace and has reconciled with the decision. It is a time for a new beginning in the Church.  New hands will take over the responsibility. Ekm diocese also gets a new person.

He has been very kind and sensitive.Has always referred to me with great sensitivity and understanding. He has been very loving and compassionate. God bless him.

The new decisions will be announced at the press conference at 4.30 pm. I remember especially these days the help given to me by my friends in the USA, especially by the Fuselli family.

I have no words to thank them for their love and kindness. God had given me enough time to enjoy that friendship. 

Dec.8, Friday

We had a concelebrated mass this morning. The Cardinal took part in it as an ordinary priest.

Yesterday evening was the announcement of the Resignation. All the press and the TV people were present there. He read a short message in Malayalam of his resignation. He appeared weak and fragile. Responded to a few questions from the press. Bp. Vaniapurakal would be the new administrator of the Church. He gave some responses to the questions from the press. Until that moment, he was the Face of the Church. He made the Church present in all situations. Now the picture has changed. Today’s papers carried the news of his resignation. Mathrubhoomi  paper gave a nice presentation inside about the Cardinal and the SM Church. Wrote a nice editorial, praising the role of the SM Church.

I feel sorry for him as he almost got shrunk and has grown less firm in his appearance. May God bless him. He was a tower of strength for me personally.

May Mary our Mother protect him.

Jogy just now called. All got the news of the resignation.

Dec.20Wednesday

A lot of time has passed.

After announcing the decision, he gave up all the privileges he had enjoyed as the MABP.

I did translate some documents for the Chancery. 

Dec.18th—my ordination anniversary –concelebration with the Cardinal. As he was going out immediately after that, there was no celebration. The family had lunch at the BTH. Johnachan and Leelamma  made the arrangement.

Yesterday, I went to the Priests’ home. Met all the priests. Sponsored lunch for them. Returning from Chy, we had a car accident. It hit on the back of another car stopped suddenly at Irimpanam.Biju was just behind that car. We left the scene. Today , gave the car to the Chembumuku mechanical shop. I have to be without the car for a few days.

Thank God, no serious damage or personal injury did happen. I thank the Lord for the blessings.Johnachan was informed and he talked with me at the scene of the accident.

I have a persistent cough.

Liju and Linu are at home. Yesterday, I stopped at Chembumukku and spent some time with them.

Today is a silent day for me. I will spend some time reading and praying.

Jan 4,Thursday

A lot of things have happened. We had the Christmas celebration on 25^th. I bought a shirt as a gift for the Cardinal. We had the family dinner at Kochumon’s house. Returned in the evening. From that time onwards, a lot of trips took place. Went to Thathampally for Kunjamma chechi anniversary, on 27^th, Kumarakom the anniversary of Vavachan and Thankamma’s  marriage. Also a houseboat trip with Santosh. Anniversary of  Prof.KK Mathew, lunch with Santosh at Marriot on 29^th. Went to Pala for Tholanikal Jubilee on Jan.2. Went to Chy on Jan 2 evening to say prayers at the house of M.J.James for his wife who passed away.

I wrote a blog on the resignation of MABP explaining some of the facts.

All are getting ready for the Synod to elect the new MABP.

Lord, thank you for your blessings. Help me to spend my life in prayers and devotions focusing  on you.

Jan.10,Wednesday

The election of the Major Archbishop was done yesterday. The name is supposed to be announced this evening if the confirmation from the Vatican comes today.It has not come yet. Three names are in the air, Bps.Vadkel(uj),Bp.Kallarnagatt and Bp. Thattil. But no public announcement has yet been made.

What makes the whole thing surprising is the way Abp was deprived of his post through the acceptance of his resignation. What was in his hands was handed over to Rome. He was told so many times to resolve the issue. He depended on other bps and thought that they would help him.

It is now 3pm and I am also waiting for the announcement. They planned to have the installation tomorrow. Hope it will be announced today.

The Synod is continuing. They are discussing other matters.

These days , I have not been doing much.I am not reading nor writing.I have to get back into a learning mode

Jesudas is celebrating his 84^th birthday,Sathabishekam. I am also moving to my 84^th with the new year.

I may have to publish a book on my reflections on priestly life. Just a few copies, to be done nicely. A farewell book.

I have to begin reading and using my time to praise the Lord.He has given this time to praise and adore him.Varghese’s wife is still in the hospital. They are suffering much. Lord, have mercy on them. I pray to you to do a miracle for them. Let her be healed. You have mercifully healed so many .Lord, come and bless them.

Ja.26,Friday

So many things have happened in between.

I went to the house of Joseph Varghese with Georgekutty to offer prayers. He was a gentle and quiet person. He had a lot of admirers. He passed away quietly.Georgekutty gave a short introduction.

Went to the house of K.V. Thomas.He passed away quietly.I did not know that he was sick. I spoke a few words after the office for the dead. It was at Edappally.

Sunnykutty Kurian too passed away. I couldn’t go to his house.

I went to the priest’s home to view the body of Fr.Mancherikalam.Said the office for the dead.Spent a little time with Jose P and Fr. Joy.

Two days ago George Vacha invited me for supper at Roastown. Dony came to pick me up. It was a lovely dinner. The food was excellent.

Today is the Republic day.I said mass privately.I find it more relaxing and convenient. I have enough time for Bible reading and meditation. I don’t have to rush. My old Mac doesn't open the BofA account as I think it’s outdated according to them. Tonight I have to call Jogy and get the new computer recognized by the bank.

 

thanks-46

 Thank you -46,

Aug.20,Sunday

 

Today is the day the Apostolic Delegate has asked the priests of Ekm to offer the mass in the Synodal way. Most of them refused except a few. There was opposition from the laity at the Basilica when Fr. Antony started saying the mass. He also stopped saying the mass. In some other parishes too there was opposition. During these days of resistance, most of the people were wrongly guided and they have become a force.

The Church and the Eucharistic celebration have been mocked and vilified. A great shame has been brought on to the Church. The secular media and those who are against the Church are having a field day showing the division and dissension among the Catholics.

  If some flexibility and sensitivity were shown, things could have been much more smooth. People need time to undergo changes in their mindset. A new pastor with wisdom and pastoral sensitivity could work with these people. It may take years for the change to happen. What is the use of imposing the decision suddenly on the people who are unprepared for this?

The majority of the priests have taken it as a matter of pride and prestige to stick to their stand. We have to yield first and allow the time to repair the damage.

The apostolic delegate is not very aware of the feelings of the people and their ways of resistance. He thinks an order can change the situation.

Tomorrow is the beginning of the Synod.

The blessing of Varghese’s house will take place tomorrow.

Aug 21, Monday

Went to Chy for the blessings of the house of Varghese. It is a beautiful and compact house.  I went to the priests’ home and took Palakunnel achan with me.I did the blessing. Gave Varghese a cheque for Rs.5000. They had arranged a cake for my birthday celebration.

The trip went OK.  Returned and on the way stopped at Leelamma’s house for coffee.

Aug.22, Tuesday

My birthday celebration began with a bouquet given by the Cardinal in front of the Bishops gathered for their breakfast. Later saw Fr. Mundadan making shouts and loud verbal outbursts in the parlor. They were removed by the police. Then, went to Mathaichan’s house for lunch . The family was gathered there and said a rosary before the lunch.I gave the ladies the newly made silver rosaries. Joy Kurian,  Thommachan  etc called to give their greetings.

Thank you, Lord, for another birthday. I have to spend the year thanking the Lord. Lord, keep me in your love.

Sept.19

I had the blood test a few days ago. Hibac was very high—8. The doctor changed the medications. Now taking insulin 19 and a new pill was added to be taken along with the food in the morning.

Yesterday

Yesterday, went to Chy to attend the funeral of Prof.Jose Joseph. Said the office at his house. Prof.K.A. Goergekutty was also with me and after that went to A.V. Thomas’ house. He is bedridden. Had lunch at the college . The rincipal was there and he joined me for lunch.

The classes for junior priests are going on and will be over by tomorrow.

Last Saturday, went to the theatre to see the movie on the life of Sr.Rani Maria called The Face of the Faceless. It was well done and all of them were realistic in their presentation.

Went to Alleppey last week to say an office for the dead for Joy Mannooparampil, the husband of Gracykutty’s sister.

I am using an App called Essentials which takes BP. But it is not correct when checked with the Bp by the manual BP monitor.

It was deleted and canceled.

Sept.25,

On 23 and 24, went to Thathamaplly for the Patronal Feast. The  Feast was on 24^th and I was the main celebrant.On 23^rd evening, I met the brothers and sisters of Ouseppachan.The celebration of the feast went very well.

Today, the newly elected MLA Chandy Oommen would be coming to the house to meet the Cardinal in the morning at 9.30 am. But he is getting late. He came just at 10 am and I met him.

Oct 10

We had a retreat from Oct 2-6. The retreat was good. I made some changes to  my schedule.Would spend some time after 10.30 pm for personal prayer. One of the main messages he said in passing was that one should not be worried about one’s past sins once it is confessed. We have to accept that we are forgiven.

Tomorow,Oct.11. Ammachi’s memorial mass. Will be going to Thathampally.

Sajan came a few days ago and I took him to the airport yesterday.

 

The Cardinal has gone for the Synod and hence things are quiet around here.

Oct.13.

Went to Ammachi’s mass at Thathampally. Kochayan, Gracykutty Johnachan and Cheriankunju were there for the mass. Biriyani was ordered from the restaurant.

Today, there is not much to do. Will read the Bible and take notes.

Thank you, Lord, for this time. I am now cutting watching TV at night  and spending more time on personal prayer. Thank you Lord for the health given to me. I have to be thankful to you for ,every moment in my life.

Oct27,Friday

Today is a day of prayer and fasting for peace in the world according to the appeal of the Pope. Today is the The world- Peace Day.

Yesterday,  went to Alleppey together with Fr. Adoppally and  Fr.Melvettom.Went to Ramada for lunch, and proceeded to Champakulam.

Two days before, on Monday and Tuesday, the priests went on a tour to Tamilnadu and I stayed here. 

Yesterday’s trip to Alleppey was very pleasant. Spent time with Subash,Sajan and Kunjappan.

I have been trying to rewrite my matter for the new book through chat GPT and they are coming out good.

Oct.28, Saturday.

Joined the 6.30 am mass and it was OK.

Nov.2,Thursday

Yesterday,Joshy was here and took him to the houses of Mathichan,Kochayan and Leelamma. Had lunch at Leelamma’s house.

Was tired.

Cardinal’s sister passed away. The funeral is tomorrow. Will be going there in the evening to say an office for the dead.

So also, will be going to Koottummel’s house to pray for Jigy’s mother. Her funeral is tomorrow. Lord, thank you for giving me the blessing to visit and pray for them.

Nov.3, Friday

Yesterday, Nov.2, went to Vazhappally to say the prayers for Cardinal’s sister. Said a few words. Then went to Koottummel house, said prayers for the mother of Jijy.Spoke a few words mentioning that Jijy and Rekha are the pride of SBC. Also spoke about the service of Sri Koottummel.

Today at the Dining hall, the Cardinal thanked all the fathers for their presence and mentioned my name specially too. He gave me a good rosary from the Holy Father.

Today I gave the retreat talk to the sisters at the request of Fr.Kavil as he had to leave with the Cardinal for Gorakpur. But then the Cardinal changed plans because of the funeral.

Thank God for the time given to me to experience peace and joy.

Today, I placed the order for a new printer.Rs.13888. Through my Fincore card. I extended the limit from 10000 to 15000 by opening the website of Fincore as per the direction of Lijo.

Thank you,Lord, for giving me the direction. Why should I be concerned about the amount when I am spending on other things freely?

I have no words to thank the Lord for His blessings. The trip to Chy also went beautifully well because of the company of Frs Adopally and Melvettath. 

Today , went to Ekm for lunch.

Nov. 25. I went to Edappally church for the betrothal of the daughter of Francis’ brother. It was over within 15 minutes. The brother came to my room a few days ago and he presented me with a new iPhone. Francis brought me some cash gift at the Sacristy after the ceremony.I did not take meals at Edappally as it was not brought there then.Went to ekm and had  lunch there although Jogy and all had gone to Vallarpadom.

Returned to Kakkanad after 2pm.

Dec.5, Tuesday

Concelebration this morning at 6.30 am at the chapel. I will spend the whole day reading the Bible.

These past days, we had several celebrations.Jogy’s visit ,Celebration of Kochayan’s brithday at the hotel near Padma etc

On Dec.3,  I offered mass at Xime on St.Francis Xavier’s day.

Today is a free day.

Thank you, Lord for your blessings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you-45

 Thank You ,45

 

June 22,Thursday

I begin a new chapter after my return trip from the US.

June 23,Friday

I came to the Mount around 6p.m. Attended the Ramsa and met the fathers at supper. Came to know from Fathers that the Cardinal had developed a fever and was admitted to the hospital. I was also told that Bishop Vaniapurakal has got a new job as the one in charge of the Procura. Everything was calm and quiet here but the TV began to carry the news of the letter of Abp.Andrews to Fr. Narikulam telling him about serious consequences if he did not follow the directions of the Synod. The TV tonight mentioned a letter to the Synod accusing the rebels of being in cohorts with some terrorist groups like SDP etc. Again, the pot is boiling and murkier things are happening.

 

Lord, help me to spend my time with you. I have nothing else to do except to spend my time in prayer.

June 29, The Feast of Peter and Paul, Thursday

Yesterday, went to Thathampally in connection with the planning for the Feast of the church at the request of Ouseppachan. Then, went for lunch at Lizikutty's house. She does not prepare meals anymore. It  is prepared by the aid. On the way back , visited Mathaichan. Went also to the Ekm house and got a copy of the insurance. Now, the tiredness of the trip is disappearing and I can use the time for reading. Nothing else is being done. Just use the time to thank the Lord for blessing me in making the trip.

I don’t know where I placed the old small phone(Airtel). (It was found in my drawer at home.)

July 15, Saturday

Today going to Mathaichan’s house for lunch. Leelamma and Johnachan will join me.

The sad event that has happened this month is the passing away of Vakachan on July 7^th. The funeral was held on Sunday, July 9^th. The day before on July 8^th was the wedding of Sunil, the son of Jessy at the Elamkulam Church. A lot of American youngsters were present at the wedding.

It was sad that Vakachan departed from us very suddenly. Went to his house a few times. Around six priests came from the Mt for the funeral. Fr.Kavilpurayidathil gave a very nice homily which was appreciated by the children. Yesterday was the 7^{th day} of the demise and I said mass at the Karanakodam church.

Johnachan and Leelamma called just now to say that they reached here last night.

Yesterday I had breathing problems and sneezing but they subsided by the time I got ready for the 10 am mass.

The small I phone was in my drawer at Ekm. So that problem was solved. Thank you, Lord.Thank you, St.Antony.

Yesterday, wrote a short message on the successful launching of the Chandrayaan at the advice of the Cardinal, based on the ideas given by him. The newspapers carried the news the day after.

July 16,Sunday

I said the mass in the common chapel for Fr.Thuruthipally and he would take my mass on the 28^th as he felt not well today. The ladies from the Moosariparampil family with Felix and his family were present for the mass. Later Felix came to pick me up and I went to his villa to bless the house and spend sometime with them.

Yesterday , went to Mathaichan’s house for lunch with Johnachan and Leelamma who returned the night before. Now, they are here and I have someone to talk with.

On Friday, went to the Karanakodam church to say the 7^th day mass for Vakachan and then went to their house for prayers and lunch. My cold and sneezing that were bothering me ceased that morning and hence I could say the mass. I just told the choir that my singing would be minimal and they followed my directions. Hence, the mass did not take much time. The last few days were hectic with the passing away of Vakachan.

Lord,  thank you for your love and mercy. I know I have wandered far from you. . Lord, have mercy on me.

July 21, Friday

The last three days were days of mourning for Kerala with the demise of Sri Ooommen Chandy. It is as if the whole of Kerala turned out for his funeral. His body was taken from Trivandrum to Puthuppally and the body was accompanied by large crowds of people along the way and at different junctions. People were moving with the bus carrying the body in large numbers, sobbing and crying. Watching the TV had a cathartic effect. People who watched were also crying seeing the reactions of the people. All have stories of kindness about him. His life was a true living out of a Christian way of life. Unbelievable that he could touch the lives of thousands of people all across the country.

Kochayan developed a breathing problem and was taken to the Astor Hospital. He was discharged yesterday evening. Today he is at Kochumon’s house and I went there for lunch. Kochayan and Gracykutty were there. Their maid was also there. He is OK now.

 

I have also a cough problem and gas trouble. I am using ginger and also try to inhale the puff.

Things are going OK by the grace of God. I have to find my source of joy and peace in the Lord.

I don’t have any more good friends with whom I can share my feelings and thoughts.

August 1, I phone.

Another important thing is that yesterday I paid the Income tax amounting to more than one lakh 43000.Johnachan paid and I have to transfer the amount to him today.

A couple of days ago, I took the Mac Air for a change of its battery costing Rs.8000.Now it is working well.

By the grace of God, I am OK.

On Saturday, I went to Thathampally to inaugurate the Golden Jubilee for Fr. Michael Peedikayil.

Aug.8,  Tuesday

Today  went to the Priests’ home to offer my regards to Fr. Vayalil who celebrated his 90^th on Sunday.  I thought it was proper to show my respect to him.He was very much touched that I went all the way from Ekm to Chy just for him. I gave him a shawl and gave cakes to Kariachan. But he did not mention the matter of the cakes to the priests while at lunch. But he was very courteous and took the effort to serve me lunch. I had a chance to meet some of the priests while at lunch and could talk about the past in our life in their new drawing room.

The night before last , had a long sitting with the MABP and he shared some of the confabulations that were taking place in the higher-ups.We realize then how chimerical were these offices. I am happy that with my small roles to play, I can lead a quiet and happy life, spending my time in total devotion to Our Lord.

I have been suffering from a cough and my use of onion with jaggery is helping to feel some relief.

Thank you. Lord. Bless and protect me.

August 18, Friday

The Apostolic delegate issued an ultimatum to the Ekm clergy to start celebrating the Synodally prescribed form of the celebration of the mass from August 20. They have rejected it. It is going to create more commotion.

I was asked to hoist the flag on Independence Day as the Bishops were out. Gave a two-minute speech.

Will spend today reading the Bible.

 

 

Prof.K.V.Thomas

  The funeral of Prof.K.V.thomas who passed away yesterday did take place today at Edappally Church at 12 noon. I went to the house of Prof.Thomas around 11.30 am after getting the location from Dr. Isaac Paul. Without any difficulty, I could reach the house of Prof. Thomas. A few of the teachers of SB were there. I said the Office for the Dead and spoke a few words of appreciation for his service at the college. He was very gentle, and soft-spoken and was greatly respected by his colleagues. 

Mar Raphael Thattil, The New Major Archbishop

 Mar Raphael Thattil was elected the new Major Archbishop on Jan. 11 and was installed as the Major Archbishop at Mt.St.Thomas on Jan. 12. His election was greeted with great joy and enthusiasm as his name was a surprise and was not mentioned in the media as a possible candidate. His pleasant nature, affability, availability, and ever-present smile have evoked a great response among the Catholic faithful. It was with great enthusiasm and happiness that people received him. There is a natural spontaneity and warmth in his interactions. He gives a new face to The Church. It is like fresh air being blown into the halls of the Church.

 His retreat talks were warmly and prayerfully received by the people at the Cathedral of Chicago. I was there on the last day to give him the vote of thanks on behalf of the diocese. I called him the crown of the Syro-Malabar Church because of the tremendous impression he has created in the minds of the people. 

We hope and pray that he will open a new chapter in the history of the Church especially because of the estrangement of the Ernakulam diocese from the mainstream of the Church. A new approach, more conciliatory and compromising has to be adopted to bring them into the fold.  It would be presumptuous to think that they would accept all the matters demanded of them within a few weeks. It may require many years for such a  transformation. What is important is the unity of the church and keeping the faithful close to Jesus. Insisting on  blind obedience and total submission is impractical. It may need more conciliatory approaches and years of walking together with them. At a time when it is difficult for us to bring another person into the Faith, we have to be careful not to alienate those who are in the Church. It is not a canonical approach that is needed but one that is charitable and magnanimous.

So many divisions in the Church have happened because of the intransigence and narrow vision of a few people in the leadership. History tells us to go slowly. "Festina lente" should be the nature of our approach.