New York--CCD Teachers' Conference

Visited the Hempstead parish.Talked to the teachers about the methodology of teaching.Gave a power point presentation on Syro-Malabar Liturgy.
My voice also improved.Had a severe cold last week when visting the Atlanta parish.
On Sunday evening, said the mass at the Hempstead parish with Fr.Ligori.Spoke to the 11th and the 12th grade students.Met the Parish council.Spoke to them about the need to buy a new church.They have formed a committee to decide on looking into the pros and cons of buying a new property---the Bethpage synagogue.

More pictures from the Reception

Thomas and the family,Sr.Lizzy,Sisters, and Mr.M.P.Varghese speaking at the Reception.

More pictures from the Reception

Greetings from Dr.Neena Joseph ,Papal Blessing,Prayers before the cutting of the cake,Sr.Regina and Sr.Lizzy and Betty singing at the meeting.

Singing by the sisters Regina ,Lizy, and Betty

70th Birthday-mass,2

Johann writing the first letter of the alphabet,In front of the Altar,Offertory Procession.

Reception at Avenue Regent

Anu and Riya singing greetings,Cutting of the Cake with Johaan around,Allen givinga bouquet and Sr.Lizy , leading the prayer.

70th Birthday-mass

The mass ,being celebrated at St.Martin's Church.

70th Birthday

The family after the mass ;speaking at the reception at the Hotel Avenue Regent; the lighting of the lamp at the beginning of the mass.The mass was celebrated at St.Martin's Church,Palarivettom.

Teaching at S.B.College: Lecturer

Lecturer:

As per the direction of Msgr.L.J.Chittoor who was the administrator of the Diocese, I was appointed a lecturer in the Dept.of English. Rev.Dr.Antony Kurialacherry took charge as the Principal of the college in 1970.He is the one who appointed me to the college.

Prof.V.J.Augustine was very gracious to me and gave me the opportunity to teach in M.A.classes right away which he did not give to many of the other lecturers who were senior to me in the Dept.

In my first year as a lecturer, I was sent as a delegate along with Prof.V.S.Joseph to participate in a National Conference on American Literature organized by the American Embassy.I presented a paper on D.H.Lawrence.The participation in the conference made me enthusiastic to go for research in the U.S.

Another memorable thing is that we formed a Brains Trust under the auspices of the Dept. of English for faculty improvement. I presented a paper on "The Impersonal Theory of T.S.Eliot."

After a couple of years of teaching, in 1973, I was appointed the warden of St. Joseph’s hostel which increased my public role in the life of the college.The role as the warden gave me more opportunities to work with the students on various levels .Most of the students in the hostel were were very studious .I was happy that I got a chance to get involved in their lives and to help them to get motivated not only in their studies but in other extracurricular activities.

An unforgettable incident that happened in 1976 was the sudden and accidental death of Fr.James Valiaparampil.We were ordained together and did our postgraduate studies at the same time at S.B. . We also joined the college in the same year.He was one of my close friends as well as a great mentor.Even though we were classmates,he was two years older .We were wardens of neighboring hostels.While I was at St.Joseph’s, he was at St.Thomas’.On March 13,1976,Fr.James Valiaparampil went with his colleagues in the Dept.of Chemistry on a boat tour.I saw him waving his hand towards me in the morning as he was leaving for the tour .It was in March 1976 that Fr.James passed away.The funeral was attended by a large crowd.He was loved by all.H always was ready to help any one who asked him for assistance. He was a good friend of mine and I miss him sorely in my life.

In 1976, I got permission from the Archbishop to go for higher studies in the U.S.I applied to several Universities.Indiana State University offered me teaching assistance. I did then apply for a visa . I went to Madras for the visa after the Christmas celebrations in the hostel.I was able to get the visa and when I came back, I told my students after the night prayer about my decision to leave them and proceed to the States.I saw most of them crying . I was also sad in the sense that I won’t be able to see many of them in my life. They would all drift into different walks of life. Life’s journey would take them to different places. I got a shadow of that experience while I was returning from Madras after securing the visa and met some of our students at the Ernakulam bus station on my way to Changanacherry. They were the members of the Basket Ball team leaving for some college for the match. A good number of the players in the team was from my hostel.When I told them that I was returning form Madras with a visa for the States, they too broke down.

Everything moved fast and I was leaving India immediately after Christmas.I had to join the course at the Indiana State in the first week of Jan.

The hostel honored me with a farewell meeting at the Archbishop Kavykattu Hall.The parents were also there and some of them spoke at the meeting.My mother , brothers and all the students came to the airport.The students came in a bus.Fr.Maroor took pictures of the departures at the college as well as at the airport .

The fathers who were teaching in the college were very warm and friendly to me.The Principal,Rev.Dr.Antony Kurialacherry had written several reference letters for me to different Universities.

I also remember a trip that I had with him when he invited me to accompany him on a trip to Madras by car from Changancherry.He had tremendous confidence and courage.He decided on constructing some new buildings on the college campus—a new library ,a big Auditorium honoring the late Archbishop Mar Matthew Kavukatt and a staff hostel.The problem was the shortage of cement.Fr.Kurialacherry wanted to go to the office of the cement controller in Madras.That is why he wanted to go to Madras.I was just a fresh appointee at the college.But he wanted someone to go with him.We went to the office and I was waiting outside as he went in.But after an hour he came out beaming with joy.During the conversation, it happened that they found out that they were both students of the Loyola college, Madras. Permit for the needed bags of cement was granted immediately Fr.Kurialacherry got what he had asked for.Wagon loads of cement bags came to Changanacherry at a low price.

I enjoyed teaching.I was staying at the Staff Quarters with other bachelor lecturers as companions.After the class, we used to play badminton.It was a very fun time.We were back again in the court like young college students.Those who would like to play would wait for their chance.Those who came first after the evening tea break were the first to enter the court.Fr.Enas who later became the Principal of St.Thomas College,Palai was a very good player.In one of the annual competitions , my team with prof.T.J.Kurian won the prize.

In my first year of teaching, I received the Proficiency prize and the special award for my MA.Final Exams at the college Day celebrations.All my students clapped very heartily and cheerfully when I got on to the stage to receive the prize.

It was said by Fr.Mutttath who was then in Malayalam B.A class that Prof.Ulahannan Mappila remarked very positively about my teaching in his remarks to them as he got a chance to observe one of my first classes.

Prof.Ulahanna Mappila was my teacher while I was an undergraduate student at S.B.He had always treated me with great fondness.

Another remarkable thing was that I was appointed the Managing Editor of the college magazine and that gave me a lot of interaction with the teachers and students.I was also appointed the Managing Editor of the college souvenir published in 1973.The editing and the publishing of the souvenir gave me ample opportunity to work with the senior Professors in the various departments of the college.Prof.Ulahanna Mappila wrote a superb history of the college.That history is still a land mark.At that time many said that it was more on Prof. Mappila than on the college.But I did realize the importance of his writing and allowed it for publication without making any changes in it.

For the funds for the publication , I went with Profs.K.V.Joseph and A.E.Augustine to several firms in Cochin.We were successful in garnering some amount through advertisements.

It was Fr.Kurialacherry who changed the academic map of the college by erecting a big auditorium known as the Kavukattu Hall,the four storied Library and a Staff Quarters with chapel and a dining hall.He was a visionary and an inspiring presence on the campus.I was privileged to work with him and it gave me a lot of confidence.

My Life at the College as an M.A.Student

I stayed at the Staff Quarters.Prof.V.J.Augustine was the Head of the Dept. He took a special interest in me and encouraged me to do my best in studies. it was his encouragement that enabled me to do well in exams. i was placed in the fourth Rank at the Kerala University exam.

It was while I was in the first year of M.A. that Archbishop Kavukatt passed away. While I was about to finish the mass in the private chapel I was told about the demise of the Archbishop.Myself and Fr.James Valiaparampil went to to the Archbishop’s house right away after the mass. In those days , fans were very few at the Bishop’s house.Our two table fans were given to be used there at the hall where the body was lying in state.

The demise of the Archbishop was a sad moment in my life. Even though I never had any close interaction with him except on formal occasions, I knew that he cared about me and that he knew me well. He allowed me to go for graduate studies and told me even before I started the course that I would be appointed in the Dept. of English. He changed the whole course of my life. What a gifted and saintly person he was. All through my stay in the United States for my doctoral studies, I kept his picture in the Bible I was using for daily reading and reflections.
His voice and his words are still unforgettably stamped in my mind. At one of the meetings after the Liberation struggle, he said the following words: " Hate communism but don't hate communists." It was the ideology that should be resisted and not the people. He was the one who gave very strong leadership for the historic Liberation struggle against the communists in Kerala.When the communists were determined to pass their notorious Education Bill, the Archbishop ordered all the schools to be closed and not to be reopened after the summer vacation.

At another meeting in the Kallarakal hall, quoting from Tennyson and said: " It is better to have loved and lost and never to have loved at all."

I was one of the coffin-bearers in the funeral procession when his body was taken for the funeral.I feel privileged and happy that he was the one who ordained me and sent me for higher studies. All that I did as a preist was because of the initial start he gave me in my life.

Tour:

After the viva for the M.A., some of us priests went on an All India trip.Fr.James Valiaparampil,Fr.Antony Kadavil and Fr.Thomas Mattappally were in the group.We went straight away to Calcutta and stayed at St.Xavier's college.From there, we proceeded to Mother Teresa’s convent .We visited the places in Kalighat where the old and sick were nursed by the sisters as well as to the place where the abandoned children were taken care of.Mother Teresa was not there.We talked with some of the sisters .Some were from Changnacherry.We met a young foreign-born sister.We asked her how it came about that she joined the convent.She told us her story of meeting Mother Teresa at the Eucharistic congress in Bombay when she came to attend it a tourist from Germany.At a lunch hosted by the Archbishop of Bombay, she was sitting opposite Mother Teresa.During the lunch, the Mother was looking at her.After the lunch, she asked her why she was looking at her.Mother Teresa then told her that if she would join her convent , she would give her a sari.She left for Germany after the Eucharistic Congress but then came back and joined the convent.She was the first non-Indian to join the Congregation of Mother Teresa.

During that trip, we visited Darjeeling, Kurseong etc.The visit to some place in Darjeeling to see the Sun rise early in the morning around 3a.m. was unforgettable. We did also travel to Kalinpong in Sikkim.

From there ,we returned to Kerala through Nagpur.At Nagpur, we stayed at St.Charles' Seminary and also visited Raipur.At Raipur, the German Bishop himself came to the railway station with his jeep to pick us up.We stayed at the Bishop’s house.At night, we slept outside as it was very hot inside.We visited Fr.Mattappally’s brother who was a pastor in a nearby parish.

When I came back from the trip, I heard that one of my friends,Mr.Joe Tharakan had passed away.Jose was supposed to leave for the States the week before.It was a tragic piece of news.It was conveyed to me by Mr.Cherian who was a gardener then.Later Cherian worked at the college office.

Major Seminary and Ordination

St.Joseph's Pontifical Seminary

Going to Carmelgiri, the philosophy section of the St.Joseph's Pontifical Seminary was a new experience.The seminary almost looked like a college. The building looked fresh and new. The cold winds blowing through the windows at night made us feel cold and shivering.Long corridors, big library, big class rooms, more facilities, courts etc were the new conveniences available for us.

The professors were Spanish Carmelite priests.Fr.Firmin who passed away at a very early age—a year after our ordination- was very much loved by us. I felt saddened at his passing away.Fr.Aurelian was the Superior at Carmelgiri. Before our arrival , he was the Rector of seminary. He was the quintessence of humility, simplicity and gentleness.His bent figure, walking along the corridors of the seminary and greeting the students with a gentle smile , will never be forgotten.

Since some of us came with undergraduate degrees, the study in the seminary was very easy. I secured “stella”(star) ,in most of the subjects all through the seminary years.It was great hearing Fr.Michael Angel announcing the grades on the Schola Brevis Day. I enjoyed hearing him announcing my name with Stella in most of the subjects. All the students who secured more than 90% at the annual exams were given" stellas"(stars).

When I was a third year student in Philosophy at the Carmelgiri seminary, I was appointed the Prefect of the second year students. Some of the students were very artistically talented. In one of the exhibitions organized by the batch, the model of the Taj Mahal created by them won the admiration of many. I have to thank specially the Father Prefect,Fr. Alex Chettiath who was very supportive and encouraging.When he left for visits abroad, Fr.Parampath became the Fr.Prefect. I worked with both of them very cordially .I have actually enjoyed the year when I was the Br.Prefect of the second year students. Some of the students in the batch have become Archbishops. Abp.Chennoth and Abp.Kallarackal belong to that batch. It was also a time that I could interact with with Fr.Aurelian more persoanlly.I remember him patting on my back when I cracked some jokes with him.

It was while I was in the third year that we received the sad news of his demise. It was a great shock. We participated in the funeral services .A lot of priests came for his funeral. He taught us ascetic theology. It was all taught in Latin. he was loved and respected by all the students.He washed his own clothes and hence his cassocks always looked a pale yellow color.

One of the teachers I remember from the Carmelgiri days was Fr. Firmin O.C.D. He was a good teacher and he was our Fr.Prefect in the first year. I think he gave me rides in his car a few times. He died very young .He died in the first year after my ordination. I did attend his funeral. Fr.Raymond taught us philosophy .Of course,we cannot forget the four Indian professors teaching at Carmelgiri at that time: Fr.Mankuzhikary(later Bishop),Fr.Parampath, Fr.Chettiath and Fr.Thurthel.All were loved by the students and had a very good influence on the lives of the students.Fr.Mankuzhikary’s ontology classes were very famous as he used to teach in peals of laughter because of the many jokes he cracked during the classes.He was also very eloquent and sharp in his comments.

I also remember the time when I had the chance to participate in the first Shakespearean drama enacted at the Seminary. I got the role of Iago and I think, from the comments after the play, that I did my role very well. We had to memorize all the passages and it was a Herculean task. We did well. The staff from the U.C.college were also there to watch our performance .It was for the first time that the roles of ladies were played at the seminary.Two seminarians took the roles of Desdemona and Ophelia. Fr.Aurelian who watched the play walked out when he saw the ladies appearing on the stage.Fr. Mankuzhikary had to do some explanation for allowing the roles of the ladies.

I was also invited to do a role in a Malayalam play later. But I don’t think it was a great success.I was also not interested in doing any roles in Malayalam plays.But later at the theology section(Mngalapuzha),Fr.Senan Buckley invited us all to act in T.S.Eliot’s “The Murder in the Cathedral.”I think I got one of the roles of the Tempters.But it was not as exciting as the role of Iago that I did in Othello.

After the three years of philosophy,we moved to Mangalapuzha.While I was in Mangalapuzha, I was put in charge of the Shop in my first year.That was not my forte. My aptitude was for something connected with writing or reading.While at Mangalapuzha, Fr. Alex Chettiath informed me that Archbishop Kavukatt wanted to see me .So I went to Changancherry to meet him. He asked me whether I could meet the expenses for going to Rome.I told him about my brothers studying in colleges at that time .But then, nothing was heard about it. But I was happy pursuing my studies at Alwaye.

One of the incidents that remains in my memory was the time when I was in charge of the shop.During one of the vacations, we had to remain there to take the inventory of the things at the shop.One night one of the seminarians wanted me to teach him how to play cards.He and his friends came to my room in the Deacon’s block.Fr.Michael Angel somehow saw them entering my room.The next day, in the morning, as we were working in the shop we saw the Rector pacing back and forth before the door of the shop.I asked my friends to open the door of the shop more widely.He then came to us and asked me to accompany him to his room.He asked who were in my room that night.I told him the facts.He asked me to tell them to leave the seminary right away .I thought he was dismissing them.Later ,we found out that he was asking them not to stay during the vacation days at the seminary.But they had to leave that day itself.It was hard for them.

Later,when I visited Rome in 1979,he was the Rector of the Damascene college.I told him all about these past incidents.He laughed and laughed very heartily.It was the first time I heard him laughing so much.Of course, the burden of being the Rector was not there.He could enjoy all the stories from the past life.

It was decided that we would be ordained in December and not in March as was the usual practice. .I think we presented some memorandum to the Bishops for the early ordination.Things were moving very fast hence for us.After the Ordination, we were expected to come back and continue our studies for three months more.The authorities never expected that the newly ordained priests would really use the occasion to free themselves from the strict observance of the seminary rules.Some began to come late after they went out.Others went for shopping and outings.It was becoming difficult for the Fr.Prefect to control the newly ordained priests from enjoying their new found freedom.They discontinued the custom of ordaining the Deacons in the middle of the year after that.

But one thing that happened during my deacon year devastated me.That was my father’s death.Unthinkable that such a tragedy would happen to me.

In fact all through my seminary years, I was praying for the health of my parents and was asking God to keep them alive to see my ordination day.It was not to happen in that way.

For some reason, when I went to Cochin, I went to see my eldest brother Mr.M.J.Pailo who was working in the Foreign Exchange Dept. of the Bank of Cochin.He told me that the father was taking rest after a heart attack.It was not even mentioned that my father had an heart attack.The only thing that was mentioned was that he sweated profusely and that the mother took him to see the doctor.The doctor after treatment advised him a month's rest.In those days, there was no strict observance of the rest.

When I returned to the seminary, I asked the Rector permission to go home and to see my father.I never thought I would get the permission.It was unusual in those days to get permission to visit the parents even when they fell sick.He granted me the permission right away.

He had always a soft corner for me.He never denied my requests. Maybe because, I was getting good grades in the exams.

I went home and spent the few days with my family.I wrote some letters for my father and he signed those letters.One of the letters was for my brother Joychan who was in Ethiopia with his family.The letter was a letter of congratulations on the birth of Jojo.

I told him that I would be leaving the next day .He told me to go the day after that.So I changed the date.That day, one of our priests and father’s friend,Fr.Pulickal came to visit him and they had a very long conversation together. After the evening prayer and supper we all went to sleep.But early in the morning, we heard a sound , and waking up , we saw mother weeping.The lights in the house all on and I heard mother saying that she had hard some sound from father and found immediately that he was not moving. One of my brothers, Josy, ran to bring the priest and he came to give anointing of the sick The doctor was called in.It was all too late.Father said goodbye to the world.It was sudden and all happened within a flash of a second.

I remember going for the mass on that morning and all through the mass tears were rolling down my cheeks.He was such a permanent presence in our life and we could not imagine that he would depart from us so fast.The funeral was held in the evening.It was a rainy day but the rain stopped for a while at the time of the funeral.Since our house was just across the road from the church, it did not take much time for the procession to reach the church.

A lot of people and many priests were present at the funeral. My youngest brother,Bernard, was in the Pallotine seminary at that time and hence the German fathers who were his teachers came for the funeral.No one from the Major seminary came for the funeral.My friends did not get the permission to come for the funeral as it was not the custom for the seminarians in those days to attend the funeral.But Fr.Joy Palakunnel and Fr.Chemmazham somehow came the next day to see me.It was a great consolation.My brother Joychan and his family were in Ethipoia at that time and hence they were not present.

After a week, I went back to the seminary and I remember myself weeping silently during the classes for weeks as the thoughts about my father's sudden demise came into my mind often.

The time came for our ordination on 18th of December.We went to the Cathedral at Changanacherry for the ordination.Archbishop Mar Kavukatt ordained all of us in one ceremony at the Cathedral.I said the first mass in the evening of Dec.18th.My brothers did all the arrangements.Fr.Reynod Purackal, the director of St.Antony's orphanage, gave the homily at the first mass.

The reception was held in front of our house and I remember Fr.Ithiparampil speaking at the reception.When I spoke in reply, I had to mention my father’s absence and the reference to my father filled my eyes with tears again. I wrote a poem about my father on the back of the picture cards that I distributed.

After a few days of vacation, we were back at the seminary.

Then , when the holidays came, we were sent home.

All of us together met the Archbishop and while we were taking leave of him gave us each Rs.150 as stipends for 30 masses . It was a lot of money then.We went on a trip together to Kanyakumary and then went on our different ways for the Easter duties.

I was waiting for my assignment.I was sure that I would not get a chance to go for higher studies although I was one of the top students in the seminary.

The Archbishop at our ordination emphasized that we should not look for opportunities for higher education but should get interested in any assignment that would be given to us.May be because three of us in that batch were graduates.

Since I did not get any assignment, I went to the Archbishop’s house one day as I heard that others were given parish assignments.Fr.Paul Urumpackal who was the secretary of the Archbishop told me not to wait there but to go home.Later word was sent to me through Fr.James Valiaparampil to meet the Archbishop.When I went there, Kavukattu Pithavu told me to go to the college and meet the Principal,Msgr.Kalacherry.He told me also to take English for my M.A. as there would arise a vacancy in that Dept.How thoughtful he was!I can never forget him.He even praised me once when I made a visit to the Bishop’s house.He mentioned to the fathers when I left that I had secured a triple class in my B.Sc.

I am deeply grateful to Archbishop Mar Matthew Kavukatt for giving me this opportunity in the academic world and also turning the direction of my life. His decision also made me much more attached to the diocese .It made me resolve deeply to do my utmost to work for the college, for the diocese and for the Church with all my heart.

Years at the Minor Seminary and S.B.ollege

Minor Seminary

When I got the result of the S.S.L.C exam , I told my parents about my decision to join the seminary to study for the priesthood. They did not place any objection although I was the first one in the family to be placed in the first class in the S.S.L.C exam. Before I told my parents, I had already looked into the rule book of the seminary by getting it from one of the seminarians from our parish. At that time Br. Kaithanthara, Br.Joseph Alummoottil and Br.Mathew Mepreth were the ones from our parish studying at the seminary.Bro. Mathe Mepreth took me to see the Minor seminary and meet with Abp.Mar Matthew Kavukatt.The Archbishop was very much impressed by the marks and asked me how I got such good marks in English.I also met Fr.Andumalil, the Manager of the Press and also Fr.Ithiparmapil who was at that time the Vicar of Nedumkunnam church. It was Fr. Zacharias Kaithara who prayed and blessed us at the church before I went to Changancherry to see the Rector and the Bishop .Later, I went with my Father to Changanacherry for admission to the seminary.

The first few days in the seminary were very hard. I used to spend the nights in tears. That was the first time I was away from home. At night we used to hear the tuk-tuk sounds made by the wheels of ox carts moving along the road in front of the seminary on market days. The sounds kept us awake at nights.

The first year students had no cots to sleep on .We slept on the coir carpeted hall .We had to carry our own beds to the hall for our sleep and later in the morning after waking up we had to roll them and put them back on the second floor. When the bell rang at 5.30a.m., we had to rise up and say the prayer aloud. Looking back now, it looked very surprising how we did all these in those days. But we were young and we had all the desire to study for priesthood. Any sacrifice for the pursuit of our ideal was worth taking. It was a time of total giving . We had nothing as our own and everything was shared.

Fr.Olassayil was the rector and he was very gentle and kind. We had only heard stories of the imperious nature of the previous rector, Fr.Thomas Porookara. I did not get a chance to see him but all the seniors had stories about his serious nature. He was very draconian and the students lived always in fear of him. He would ask the students, the story goes, to plant small mango seedling upside down to test their obedience. No questions could be raised with regard to correctness of the planting . Implicit obedience was required of the students!

The one thing that frightened us was the custom of clipping our hair short by the barber. By sheer good luck , all those who were going to college for higher studies were given the privilege of retaining their hair styles.

I had to spend five years in the Minor seminary as I went to college from the seminary. It was when we joined the college that the Pre-Unversity course was introduced. There was no choice with regard to science or arts major. It was after the Pre-University that one joined the three-year degree course where one could choose the courses in the science or arts stream.

The highlight in the Pre-University course was that I was awarded the Proficiency prize at the college Day. The Governor of Kerala, Mr. Ramkrihna Rao was the chief Guest at the college day program.It was a great honor to receive the prize from him. Being a seminarian , I did not take it a as very prestigious honor as I did not want to show any feelings of excitement . Hence I did not even tell the rector about the award.

Fr.P.C. Mathew was the Principal and his strict administration helped the college to keep a very high academic standard. Fr.Kattady was the Syriac teacher and he was very friendly with us. On the first day of the college, I slipped on the front porch of the college as it was wet and slippery because of the rain and sullied my clothes. It was to Fr.Kattady’s room that I went and got my clothes tidied.
In the final of the year degree course, I participated in the Science Competition held by the Dept. of Physics and was awarded the first prize in the Science Test. This time, I received the prize from the first Cardinal of India, Cardinal Valerian Gracias who presided over the college celebrations.It was at this meeting that the Cardinal made the remark of Fr.A.C. Eapen who was not present at the college day celebrations, referring to Fr.A.C. Eapen's low profile in public events: "Speech is silvery; silence is golden."
I was really fortunate in getting great teachers like Prof.C.A.Sheppard for English, Prof.Ulahanna Mappila for Malayalam and Prof.S.L.Thomas for Physics. Prof.Ulahannan Mappila was endowed with an unmatchable eloquence in Malayalam. His boisterous laughter and powerful voice do still sound in my ears.

I did participate in the speech and essay writing competitions held at the seminary and was awarded prizes in these competitions

Archbishop. Mar Matthew Kavukatt used to visit us once in a while at the seminary and would address us during these visits. His quote from Wordsworth about Bl.Virgin Mary that she is the tainted nature's solitary boast is fresh even now in my mind.

After finishing up our studies at the college, we had to spend a year for the study of Latin and Syriac before joining the major seminary.

I was appointed the Asst. Prefect . Joseph Thuruthmaly and Joy Palakunnel were the other office-bearers. We were a friendly group. Another important friend at that time was James Valiaprampil We were the four graduates in the batch of nine students pursuing the final year of studies at the minor seminary.

One priest I have to mention as a close adviser was our spiritual father, Fr.Thaiparampil. His affection and guidance were always there in my life. He had a very good collection of books and he used to spend his money for buying books on literature and religion. It was from his collection that I came across the works of Thomas Merton. I got the autobiography of Thomas Merton “ The Seven Storey Mountain " from him and I remember reading the whole big book within a week He was a source great encouragement while I was studying in the minor seminary. All of us enjoyed his company. I remember spending the whole night in his room with my other friends listening to the news of the election of John F.Kennedy.

After the final exam in Latin for the entrance to the Major Seminary , we went home for the holidays. The rector was Fr.Gregory Thycherril. He was very rigid and strict. He was a former Headmaster of S.B. High school.

Another memorable thing in our minor seminary life was our attendance at the graduation ceremony. We , four of us, Palakunnel, Joseph Thuruthmally, James Valiaparampil and myself, borrowed the suits of our teachers and left for Trivandrum for the graduation ceremony at the Senate Hall. We stayed at the Lourdes church. Fr.P.C. Matthew gave us a ride to the senate Hall for the graduation ceremony. The day before, we had to go for the rehearsal. After the graduation, we went to the studio and had our pictures taken with the gown and hood .We got pictures in different sizes. I remember carrying the pictures home with great excitement and my family, including my father , all looked at the pictures with great joy.

I have to say that our minor seminary life was happy one. I thank the fathers for having given us such a beautiful time. Our evening prayers were always said at the Parel Chapel. I was leading the prayers in English and Latin.

We had so many moments of pure happiness and joy while in the seminary. Fr.Thaiparampil kept us in very good spirits. His friendship and love continued until the end of his life. I miss his presence in our life even now. He was well read and educated and hence we could feel very comfortable in our dealings with him.

Theology of the Body

Attended the Theology of the Body Congress held in Philadelphia from July 28-30.It was a well-organized Congress .The Congress revealed the great enthusiasm and leadership of a new generation of young Catholics in living their Catholic life with great fervor and devotion.It also revealed that the lay theologians have come of age and they are very loyal to the Church.Pope John 11 was everywhere in the Congress in the thoughts and speeches of the participants.The spirtual vision of John Paul ll on marriage and sexuality was well articulated by many of the participants.The thirst for new evangelization using the ideas of John Paul ll in his Theology of the body talks was very much evident.
I was very much impressed by the enthusiasm and love of so many young Catholics.There was group of Stubenville students who were spending their time in adoration all through the duration of the Congress.These students are on a walk of 2500 miles to Washington DC wearing blazers with the words of the Eucharist on them.Their plan is to talk to people if they are asked about it.
Syro-Malabar Catholics will have to learn much from what is going on in the American Church.Many of the Syro-Malabar Catholics spend their time in negative criticism and are not doing much for the faith-development in the community.
Fr.Landry from Mass. was a good speaker.He got a standing ovation from the audience.He was also a fervent admirer of John Paul ll.

High School

Leo-Xlll High School(1953-56)

It was with great joy and excitement that I joined Leo Xlll high school in 1953 to continue my studies. We had to walk for an hour at least to reach the school from Thathampally. I don’t have a great recollection of my various class mates at school. But we were a few from Thathampally at the School. Three of my close friends are V.T. Joseph Jacob and K.A. Matthew. I was very often walking along with Chandy from my home to school. Chandy would come by my house and I would go with him. We were good friends at that time. Sometimes I used to go with Pious as Pious too would come by our house. We would also return together from school to our house.

We had a habit of stopping at the Latin Cathedral just across the road form the school to pray before we joined the classes. I had only loving memories of my teachers at school especially the Jesuit Fathers. The headmaster was Fr.Paul Kunnumkal who was very serious in his demeanor but also very considerate. Fr.M.C. Joseph ,Br.Scaria and Br. John were the others who did have a great influence on my life as a student at the school. Sometimes after our terminal exams, they would ask me to meet them personally and then, would correct my papers before me. What a a great way of teaching ! When I came out top in the class in my first year at the School, I was given a special medal known as"Top Boy",presented personally by the Headmaster in front of the whole class. I remember walking home proudly wearing the medal. These awards were great sources of motivation and enabled me to keep the high grade always.

Once I remember passing through the corridor before the class of Mr. John Kattoor and he called me and my friend Chandy into the class. We were really frightened as he was very strict and used to give severe spanking . He asked who my father was. My father was at the time the Manager of the State Aided Bank of Travancore. He immediately recognized my father’s name and said right away that my father was one of his students. But poor Chandy got all the spanking.

The other teachers who come to my mind are Mr.T.X.Lawrence and Mr.John Sebastian. They were brothers. Mr. Lawrence would teach Mathematics like a novel, making it very interesting. He would sit on the table and explain in a very lucid manner the theories he was teaching. Mr. John Sebastian was not only a good teacher but also a great social worker.H was also a great activist for the Vincent De Paul Society. There were two young teachers, T.L. Isaac and Mr. Jacob Joseph Kattezham.Mr. Jacob Joseph was very inspiring as a science teacher and was involved in many extra curricular activities at the school.

On First Fridays , we had to go to the school very early in the morning for the mass. We also took part in the Stations of the cross in Lent. Fr.M.C. Joseph who led the prayers would burst into tears when he came to the the stations on the fall of Jesus. .

The religious instruction class was engaged by the Fathers and I remember the class taught by Fr.Purakal.He would explain very lucidly and beautifully the ten commandments.

I was appointed the secretary of the literary society while at the school. Working as the secretary offered me several opportunities for making short speeches as well as for making reports.Participation in literary activities developed our leadership skills.

I remember once going for the movie Macbeth screened on our campus one evening. My younger brother wanted to come with me. First I was reluctant but then after my father’s intervention, I had to take him with me. Looking back, I feel fortunate in having got an opportunity to get exposed to classic works at such an early age.

I remember the day I went to find out the result of my S.S.L.C exam results. I went to the office of the Deepika at Alleppey and there was a big crowd of students waiting to know the results. Mr. Babu Manjooran who was my senior at school spotted me from the crowd and immediately blurted out that I was placed in the first class. It was a very happy day as there were only four first classes at the S.S.L.C examination from the four batches at our school. It was with great joy that I went home to announce the results to my family.

The learning we got at our High school run by the Jesuit fathers was excellent. Every one was known by the teachers and they paid special attention to our studies and behavior. Even though in those days , we had to walk miles to reach the school, the effort was never felt as a burden. The Jesuit fathers kept a very high standard for the school. It was also a time when we had been involved in very many activities. The football team of the school was well known. The annual match between the Leo Xlll and the S.D.V High schools was a great event in the town.

It was when I was studying in the High school that Pandit Jawarhal Nehru came to town to speak at the beach .I remember going for the meeting. It was the scouts at our school that gave him the guard of honor. One of my classmates was the Captain of the scouts and he gave the guard of honor. Nehru lifted him up from where he stood and showed his appreciation for the honor.

I was asked by the Headmaster to be a delegate for the regional M.C.S.L meeting. With Mr.T.V.Abraham, I went to Kottayam by boat and took part int he discussions. it was there that I met Fr.William who was then working as the Chief Editor of the Deepika.His inspiring words, long beard and the brown Carmelite habit still remain vividly in my mind.

I kept in touch with some of my teachers after I left school. I used to write to Fr.John and I remember receiving his picture and letter after his ordination as a priest. Later, when I was the Warden of St. Joseph’s hostel, I took my students on our way to Madras by the church where he was working as Pastor in Theni.

M.nityce.

1.Washington D.C.(1980)
2.On the boat in Luzern in Switzerland(1980)

Benedictine Monastery in Virginia,1980

Visit with Benedictine monks in the Blue Mountains, Virginia in 1980

With Senator Birch Bayh from Indiana,With Frs.Antony Kurialacherry and Fr.Aenekatt,With Mother Teresa at St.Matthew's Cathedral and at St.Peter's Basilica.

Diocesan Spirituality-A Reflection

The following is a reflection on the Priestly Year

Holy Father Pope Benedict XV1 proclaimed on Friday 19, June 2009, the Feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus , in celebration of the 150^th birth anniversary of St. John Mary Vianney ,2009-10 as the Year of Priests to highlight the meaning and the importance of Priesthood. Declaring the celebration, he said: “ I think of all those priests who quietly present Christ’s words and actions each day to the faithful and to the whole world, striving to be one with the Lord in their thoughts and labors.” Without any note of triumphalism, the Holy Father pointed out the greatness and awesomeness of the priestly gift, acknowledging at the same time that this gift is given to weak and fragile human beings.

Because of the various scandals associated with a few priests in the U.S. and Europe, there was a widespread diminution of the image of the priesthood in the secular media. All the good that was accomplished by the sacrificial lives of thousands of priests all across the world was misrepresented. The consolation and comfort offered by the clergy to millions of people in their spiritual struggles have been very callously ignored. Who can give a satisfactory account of the millions of hours the priests have spent in consoling and comforting the bereaved, in offering spiritual support to the millions who have come to the confessionals, in administering the sacraments, in offering the Eucharist from day-break to sunset in all the continents of the world, and in engaging in the development of the rural areas of the world?

Hence it is right and fitting that a year should be chosen to highlight the spiritual magnificence of the Catholic priesthood. The late Holy Father in his Apostolic exhortation, Pastores Da Vobis has pointed out:

“ Priests are called to prolong the presence of Christ, the one high priest, embodying his way of life and making him visible in the midst of the flock entrusted to their care….Priests exist and act in order to proclaim the Gospel and to build up the Church in the name and person of Christ , the head and the shepherd.”

Cataclysmic changes have taken place in the world of Catholic priesthood in the US. According to a research study of modern Catholic priesthood in the U.S., done by Dean Hoge, published under the title “Evolving Vision of Priesthood”, the number of priests and vocations to the priesthood has come sharply down. “In 2001 there were 30,223 diocesan priests and 14,968 religious priests…..for a total of 45,191.This compares with 57,317 in 1985, or a decline of about 12% to 14% per decade.” The study adds further: “This number has been thinning down through the years in the U.S….The number of Catholics in the U.S. has risen continually over the past century. In 1970, the estimated number was 47 million and in 2000, it was about 61 million.” A similar change was happening at the educational level of Catholics. According to this study, “in the mid 1920s , about 6% of all American Catholics had college degrees, and in 1980, it was 28%.”.What is shown by this study is that as the religious landscape in the U.S. is changing, a lot more stresses, burdens and expectations fall on the shoulders of the clergy. The study also points out the shifting of the emphasis in ecclesiology. “The essence of the priesthood has undergone two shifts. The first occurred at the time of Vatican ll---from the older model of priest as administrator of the sacraments and teacher of the faith, to a new model of priest as a spiritual and social leader of the community. This change was accompanied by the Council’s new theology of the Church as the “People of God.” The young priests in 1970 were strongly in favor of this model. The second shift which began in the early 1980s, continues today and seems to be reversing the first.”

The changing understanding of ecclesiology also causes great tension in the lives of the priests. The old and the young have different visions and different approaches to their ministry.

Of course all these changes at the sociological and at the ecclesiological levels will not affect the essential function of the priests in their role as prophets, teachers and shepherds. The burden is much greater now as the present world, with its instant forms of communication and great technological advancements, puts great stress on the lives of priests. As communicators, administrators and as shepherd they have to remold their ministries to conform to these changing demands of the age.

It is only when one’s life is deeply anchored in the life of Our Lord that one can withstand the shifting sands of tastes and aptitudes of the faithful and hold aloft the torch of faith. Priests have to re-commit themselves to preaching the Word in the best way possible and to administering the sacraments in the most spiritual way possible. The words of the Holy Father should resound in the ears of all priests: “Lest we experience existential emptiness and the effectiveness of our ministry may be compromised, we need to ask ourselves ever anew: are we truly pervaded by the word of God? Is that word truly the nourishment we live by, even more than bread and the things of this world? Do we really know that word? Do we love it.?”

The late Holy Father John Paul II has called his memoir of his priestly life “A Gift and a Mystery.” It is a gift because priesthood transcends the merits of the individual and it is a mystery because the call comes from God at a time and place unknown to the individual: “ You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you(John 15:16).Of course, every priest is aware of his unworthiness for such a call and knows that the ministry entrusted to him is beyond his qualifications. Who can say he is worthy enough to stand in the place of Christ and pronounce over the bread and wine that “This is my body and this is my blood.”? Who has the holiness to stand in the person of Christ to forgive the sins of others? As the late Holy Father John Paul II points out, “At its deepest level, every vocation to the priesthood is a great mystery; it is a gift which infinitely transcends the individual.”

Hence,what are the special tasks of priests? Is there a special spirituality for him as a diocesan priest? As one who works in the world, constantly interacting with people, preaching, offering the Eucharist, administering the sacraments, and running institutions and organizations on behalf of the Church, how can he be a living witness to Christ? Should he get away from the world to develop his spirituality? No, it is not in getting away that the diocesan priest finds his spiritual self but in immersing himself in the lives of his people. In celebrating the sacraments, offering the Eucharist, preaching the Word of God, and running the institutions of the Church, he grows closer to Christ. In all the things he does, he sees the presence of Christ. “Holiness is not something a priest can practice by himself or apart from the community of faith. The priest becomes holy within the community by ministering to it and leading it” (The Spirituality of the Diocesan Priest, Donald B.Cozzens,p.2).

The priest unlocks the doors of holiness when he is working in close collaboration with the laity. He is the one who brings Christ to them in all the different spheres of their activity. As the Holy Father Pope Benedict XV1 points out in the Proclamation: “Priests should be willing to listen to lay people, give brotherly consideration to their wishes, and acknowledge their experience and competence in the different fields of human activity.”

Cardinal Kasper in his book “Leadership in the Church” deals with the role of priests as leaders of the community. Referring to the distinction between “production “and “representation”, he points out that for priests what is more important is representation and not production. “ There is nothing for us to make…all we can do is to offer ourselves for the purpose of representation.” The center-stage is not for priests. They must be hearers and doers of the Word. “Priestly existence”, he points out,” is existence as a witness and as a sign, not only with our lips, but with the whole of our existence.” These words of the Cardinal do explain the essence of priestly ministry which is to be a sign for Christ .

The priests know deep in their hearts that the Lord who chose them will always be with them.His walk towards Emmaus continues with them at every breaking of the bread for the people. They would hear, day after day: “ I came not to call the righteous but the sinners.”

May this Year of Priests give all of us a renewed understanding of the gift of the sacrament of the priesthood.

Early Life and Education

Even though I was born in Eadthua, Kerala and was baptized at St.George’s Church because of which I got the name George, I have no memory of spending my early days in Edathua. My aunt has mentioned later that it was Fr.Gregory Karikampally who baptized me at St.George when he was an associate vicar there. It was funny that Fr.Karikampally would mention the fact of baptizing me to my friends when he came to visit me in the office when I was the Principal .

I was the third in the family of eight, six boys and two girls. My early memory was that of living in our family home in Thathampally, Alleppey with my parents , brothers and grandmother. I have memories of seeing huge mangoes , almost the size of coconuts,hanging in small branches of the mango tree which I think is not there any more. We don’t see such mango trees any more. They are called Njetukuzhiyans(because there was a big dip where it attaches itself to the trunk). We used to visit Edathua occasionally, but more regularly at the time of the feast of St.George at the church. All of our relatives from the mother’s side would be there and our maternal grand parents were then living. We used to sleep on big “pa”s (mats) made beautifully of grass leaves. In fact pas were the ones people used to sleep on before the modern beds came into the market. It was a happy and playful time. The older children in the family would take baths in the river nearby, although I did not.

My Father was a serious person in our eyes in those early days, with strict rules for us to observe. His greatness would become revealed to us when we grew older. We would see him always dressed impeccably in the standards of those days, with his suit coat and mundu with a neriathu folded beautifully around his shoulder.He was the manger of a bank and whenever he came at night, he would have something for us in the pockets of his coat. He would bring either a ball or oranges and sweets which would know about only the next morning. We rarely have seen him on weekday nights as he would come from his office very late, stopping on the way to do errands for the family or talk to the priests.

He had his own personal assistant called Raphael and Raphael was the rikshawallh.He would pull his rikshaw through the streets of Alleppey to any place he wanted to go just as a car would take one nowadays. O f course we can never imagine allowing any one to do that now for us. In those times, that was a sign of convenient travel, and a show of ones’ status in life.

But somehow since I did my studies well in the classes given by a teacher from the school at home, I was given a promotion to the second standard. By this time we moved to our new house at Thathampally which was at that time one of its kind. We can still hear the echoes of our sounds as we opened the different rooms. It had a terrace and we could sleep on the terrace at nights. No house in that area did have a terrace in those days. We were lucky in that sense and the house was across the street from our parish church. We used to go with our father for the masses and people would always speak appreciatively of our being with the father at the masses, most of the time, may be on our knees. In the evening, when we were in our house, we could hear the loud laughter that would come from the friendly chat between our father and the vicar of the church, Fr.Sebastian Cherussery. They became good friends and they enjoyed the company of each other.

Fr.Cherusserry was a talented priest with enormous potentials-- bringing all people together, erecting necessary buildings for the church , inspiring congregation etc. It was told that he himself carried bricks and stones for the construction of the church.He was the one who extended the church by building an additional wing, built additional buildings for the school and founded the Adoration convent. He may be considered the modern architect of the vibrant St.Michael’s parish and his contribution to the parish can in no way be minimized. In vision, planning and the cohesiveness that he brought to the community, he can in no way be rivaled by any of his successors. He was also the unquestioned leader of the Catholics of the area at that time. No voice would be raised against him. It was a sad day for the parish when he was transferred to Palai to oversee the various construction projects of the newly established diocese of Palai. He was from Palai and hence the Bishop wanted him to be there. I have never seen him after that. My father was the Convener of the farewell meeting held to bid adieu to him on the Thathampally maidan(grounds) which was packed with people. He is the first vicar of my parish about whom I have good memories.

Another priest I remember well was Fr.Joseph Valiaveettil who was the associate with Fr.Cherusseril. Fr. Valiaveetil was in charge of the altar boys and he did a marvelous job if organizing them. He was a good writer andtransalted many good works from Englsih inot Malayalam for the Book a Month club which was in existence then. He created in us a sense of pride and elegance. He got new robes made for altar servers and also enrolled us into the Tarcisian league. We saw our group picture published in one American religious weekly. When I was studying in the fifth standard I gave my name for a speech competition. I hadn't made any speech before that. I approached Fr.Joseph for help and he wrote out a speech in Malayalam for me .I delivered that speech and I got the first prize along with a friend of mine C.P.Joseph who became a priest later. I don’t know whether the sisters knew that the speech was written by the associate pastor. That prize gave me a tremendous sense of satisfaction and pride . I think I got a book in English as the prize which I could not read or understand at that time.

Fr.Joseph took us on several trips and only those who could afford the fare joined those trips. We remember one memorable trip that we took to Changanacherry when the two new bishops Mar Matthew Kavukattu and Mar Vayalil who were consecrated for Changanacherry and Palai were staying at the time at the Bishop’s House in Changancherry. We met the bishops and the Bishops gave all of us pictures as a memento of our visit. When we came down we met Msgr.Kallarackal, who was the Apostolic Administrator during the interim period after the death of Mar James Kalacherry. Msgr. Kallarackal was in his old age , looking almost like a Christmas Pappa. He played a trick on us. He stretched out his hand asked all of us to give back the pictures given by the Bishops. He scared us by saying that if we didn’t give the pictures the boat by which we came to Changancherry from Alleppey would capsize. All of us gave our pictures to him. Now we realize that he was senile and out of his senses at that time. Otherwise who would ask kids to give back some thing that they cared for deeply?

Fr.Joseph Valiaveetil later went from the parish for higher studies in Malayalam Literature at the University college. It was while he was there that he was given a prestigious award in Malayalam debates. He took his M.A. through private study. He joined the Dept. of Malayalam at St. Berchmans’ college. Then he thought of a monastic vocation and joined the Franciscan order. He didn’t remain there long. He returned to the diocese and to the college. He was lovingly called “Ouseppachan “ in the college campus. Surpsingly when I joined the college as a member of the Dept. Of English, Fr. Joseph was there. He always kept a fatherly affection for me. I was there for all the important events in his life: to speak when he was given a farewell by the Adoration Convent, Vazahappally, at the celebration of his birthday at the convent etc. He was acting as their chaplain after his retirement from the college. He wanted to see me before he died. But the message did not reach me in time. I didn’t know he was hospitalized. When I went to see him, he was in coma. Somehow it happened, I was designated to speak at his funeral and I felt really blessed in my heart to speak at his funeral. That is only the funeral of a priest that I had preached in my life.

I completed my primary and middle school education at St. Michael’s school, Thathampally . Some of the teachers that stand out in my mind are Mr.George who taught us Hindi, Sr.Espirit, Sr.Mary Kuracherry and Sr.Antonisaamma Kattampally. I had the happiness of taking communion to Sr.Antonissammma when she was admitted in the Medical college Hospital , Alleppey.

Antonissamma was my primary school teacher. In those days since the convent didn’t have any newspapers,she would ask me to bring the paper from our house for her to read as our house was just a couple of yards away from the school. She would then write in my book all the meanings of words that I missed in my note book in her own beautiful handwriting.I had some good friends in the primary school in Mr. V.T. Joseph, K.M. Mathew, Jacob etc. We moved from St.Michael's to Leo Xlll for our high school studies. We have to walk four or five miles every day back and forth to go to school. Very few had bicycles and hence most of us walked all the way. All of us coming from Thathampally had a good habit. Before entering the school compound, we would stop at the nearby Church (now it is the Cathedral of Alleppey diocese) and spent a few minutes in prayers. All of us did, even those who were mischievous and undunruly. It was an unwritten rule to visit the Blessed Sacrament , passed from generation to generation.

The atmosphere at Leo X111 was very different. The atmosphere was more mature and there was a mixing of students and teachers from different parts of the town. This is the same school where my father and my elder brothers studied. In fact there was a teacher Mr. John from Kattoor who taught my father. There was an interesting incident. When my friend Chandy and myself were passing by his class room, he called us both inside and asked more details about us. When he found that I was Mr. M.P. Joseph’s son, he let me go by saying that he had taught my father, Mr.Joseph. He gave Chandy a good spanking with the cane in his hand. I still feel sad for Chandy!

The teachers who stand out in my memory are: Fr.Paul Kunnumkal , our headmaster, Fr.John Meemepellikavil S.J. Fr. M.C.Joseph and Fr.Scaria ( who left priesthood later), Mr.C.X. John, C.X. Lawrence,T.L.Issac, Mr. Jacob Kattezham, and Mr. Kuncheria. The three years we spent there were some of the best years of formation. Fr.Scaria would invite us personally from our holidays to show us the corrections in our English papers. Fr. M.C. Joseph was a source of great inspiration in the spiritual formation of the students. On First Fridays, we would come to the school chapel early in the morning . Fr. M.C. Joseph would lead the stations of the cross for us and we could hear his sobbing words as he would come to the sections dealing with the fall and crucifixion of Jesus. He was also instrumental in starting a very good basket ball team for the school.

My journey to the Minor Seminary,1956

I was going by boat from Alleppey to Changanacherry on a sunny day in 1956.I was happy in making the journey because even though the boat ride was more than four hours , it was worth making as it gave a spectacular view of the lakes, rivers and paddy fields stretching for miles .It was if a green carpet was spread on the banks of the vast lakes. The boat made a few stops in between for the passengers to get in and get out at their designated jetties. The ride gave an inkling into the life in Kuttanad as the boat slowly chugged through the winding lakes and rivers.

As I was enjoying this magnificent vision of the scenes around the lakes, a Hindu gentleman who identified himself as a lawyer, sitting beside me, asked in English : “Where are you going?”. He saw the S.S.L.C book in my hand and wanted to know about my plans. As he saw that I had been placed in the first class, he asked again:” What are you going to do?” I told him that I was going to join the seminary to become a priest. It jolted him to think that one who was placed in the first class was going to join the seminary. In those days, students placed in the first class were very few. The Jesuit-run LeoXlll School,Alleppey, where I studied had only four students who were placed in the first class in that year. He asked again: “Why do you want to become a priest?” That question still rings in my years. Then and now, my answer has been the same: “ I want to serve My Lord.”

I was not drawn by any priest or any special event to priesthood other than by the love I had for Jesus. It was a strong desire in my heart to work for Jesus. I have to mention specially Fr.Joseph Valiaveettil, an associate priest at the Thathampally church who started the association for the altar servers and made us all join the group. He taught us how to serve at the mass and took us on trips.

The role of my parents in nurturing and fostering my faith was immense, beyond words to describe. The love, kindness and the compassion of my mother and the ardent and intense attachment of my Father to the Eucharist are to be mentioned as great formative influences. Nobody ever mentioned at any time in my life about the vocation to priesthood nor have I attended any special camps or retreats for vocations. Those were not in existence in those days. It was the Christian life lived at home that made my relationship with Jesus very intense and warm. I am sure the same is true of other seminarians too in those days.

I have to mention specially the role of my father when I have to speak about my vocation to priesthood. My father was the manager of a bank in Alleppey which was known as the State-aided Bank of Travancore, the only bank under the control of the State of Travancore. He was one of the very few in Alleppey at that time with a college degree. He went to the American College in Madurai, staffed by American missionary professors. It was a Protestant college as at that time no Catholic college was in existence in Travancore. It was a custom for him to take us always to the Sunday masses along with him. He would attend masses daily before he went to the office. If there were two masses, he would participate in both .Eucharist was every thing for him. The participation in the daily masses by an educated man like him and a manager of the Bank, a rare job in those days, was a source of inspiration not only to us, his children, but also to many in the parish.

In those days when nobody in our place had heard about the works of Bishop Fulton J. Sheen, he would buy the works of Sheen and read them in his spare time at home, especially on Sundays He had a collection of all the works of Sheen. He would ask me sometimes to read the books while he was relaxing in his reclining chair. I remember reading the “Peace of Soul”, a great work of Sheen of which I could not make head or tail in those days. The matter and the language of the book were beyond the comprehension of a high school student. Sheen was refuting all the current theories of Psychology and Psycho-analysis in that book. I still feel aghast at the fact that I could read aloud such books.

He would also read the Bible when all of us children are together and explain to us how the words of Jesus were guiding his life. When priests and other prominent visitors visit our house, there would be long discussions on matters of faith with them by my father.

Some of the rules he made us practice are still vivid in my mind. He would remind us to keep a respectable distance from priests as too much familiarity would make us lose reverence for priests. We could hear from our house which was across the road from the church his boisterous and friendly laughter and conversations with the parish priest of that time, Fr.Sebastian Cherussery ,on his return from the office at night.

That faith-filed atmosphere at home has definitely created in all of us a great attachment to our faith. Six of us ,boys , were growing up together but no discussion of priesthood ever came in our family life.

I was fortunate to get good teachers at Primary and High School levels. The Jesuit fathers at the High School and the sisters and the lay teachers at the Primary School were also responsible in molding our Christian faith .I have to mention my headmaster, Fr.Paul Kunnumkal, Fr.Joh Meempallikavil, Fr.M.C. Joseph etc as some of the great teachers at our High Scool. I remember very fondly the love and affection of Sr.Anonissamma and Sr.Espirit of the Adoration convent. Sr. Espirit taught a prayer that I have never forgotten. She told me to say a prayer :”Blessed Virgin Mary , pray for me”, whenever I passed before the grotto in front of the school play grounds.. In my life, thousands of times, I had to pass by the grotto and in all those occasions and even now if I pass by it, I say that prayer. Another prayer, also taught by one of my teachers at the Primary School, remains fresh in my mind even now. He told me and my friends that, before writing the answers in exams, to say a prayer to the Little Flower: “ Little Flower in this hour, show thy power.” I have said that prayer years later at my doctoral exams (Comprehensives) here in the U.S.

So, there in a nutshell is the story of my vocation. All those good and dedicated teachers and my parents were responsible in creating in me an ardent love for Jesus. It is that love that took me to the portals of a seminary.

After my results were known, I told my parents the desire to join the seminary. Even the parish priests had no idea that I would be joining the seminary. I had to make another decision whether to join the diocesan seminary or to the Society of Jesus to which all my priest- teachers belonged. I got the Rule Book of the Minor Seminary of Changanacherry and read everything in it. It was a small hard bound book, written in English. I got it from one of the seminarians in our parish. I decided after carefully reading the Rule book to join the diocesan seminary and went with one of the seminarians, now a priest(Fr.Matthew Mepreth) to meet the Bishop of Changancherry , Mar Mathew Kavukatt. He was surprised to see that I got very good marks in English and the congratulatory remarks that he made at that time still echo in my years.

I am thankful to the Lord for calling me to serve him and I am very happy to say that He was always present in my life. At every decisive moment in my academic and administrative life, he was there holding my hands and guiding me. What a joy it is to know the Lord and to feel His presence in one’s life. All the sacrifices and burdens of life appear nothing before the overwhelming mercy and compassion of the Lord. What prompted St. Paul to say : “ When Christ is with us, who can be against us”, is my feeling and I am sure the feelings of every one who commits himself to Christ.

The human dimension of love and companionship that one misses in priestly life is compensated by the love and affection of the people that they serve. In my life, because I was a teacher and an administrator, I was compensated by the love and affection of my students and colleagues.

The words of Thomas Merton, who is one of my very favorite authors and whose seminal work “The Seven Storey Mountain” that I read before joining the Major Seminary, are my own words at this fag end , when I see before me the evening sky splashed with the crimson radiance of the fading sun of my career and life:

“Let this be my only consolation, that wherever I am, You ,my Lord, are loved and praised. The trees indeed love you without knowing you. The tiger lilies and corn flowers are there, proclaiming that they love You, without being aware of Your presence. The beautiful dark clouds ride slowly across the sky musing on you like children who do not know what they are dreaming of, as they play. But in the midst of them all, I know You, and I know Your presence…..Only one thing I ask: that the memory of them should not make me afraid to receive into my heart the gift of love which you have placed in me.”

To those who aspire to follow Jesus , I have this message to convey: Fall in love with him and He will lead you to make the right step.