My journey to the Minor Seminary,1956

I was going by boat from Alleppey to Changanacherry on a sunny day in 1956.I was happy in making the journey because even though the boat ride was more than four hours , it was worth making as it gave a spectacular view of the lakes, rivers and paddy fields stretching for miles .It was if a green carpet was spread on the banks of the vast lakes. The boat made a few stops in between for the passengers to get in and get out at their designated jetties. The ride gave an inkling into the life in Kuttanad as the boat slowly chugged through the winding lakes and rivers.

As I was enjoying this magnificent vision of the scenes around the lakes, a Hindu gentleman who identified himself as a lawyer, sitting beside me, asked in English : “Where are you going?”. He saw the S.S.L.C book in my hand and wanted to know about my plans. As he saw that I had been placed in the first class, he asked again:” What are you going to do?” I told him that I was going to join the seminary to become a priest. It jolted him to think that one who was placed in the first class was going to join the seminary. In those days, students placed in the first class were very few. The Jesuit-run LeoXlll School,Alleppey, where I studied had only four students who were placed in the first class in that year. He asked again: “Why do you want to become a priest?” That question still rings in my years. Then and now, my answer has been the same: “ I want to serve My Lord.”

I was not drawn by any priest or any special event to priesthood other than by the love I had for Jesus. It was a strong desire in my heart to work for Jesus. I have to mention specially Fr.Joseph Valiaveettil, an associate priest at the Thathampally church who started the association for the altar servers and made us all join the group. He taught us how to serve at the mass and took us on trips.

The role of my parents in nurturing and fostering my faith was immense, beyond words to describe. The love, kindness and the compassion of my mother and the ardent and intense attachment of my Father to the Eucharist are to be mentioned as great formative influences. Nobody ever mentioned at any time in my life about the vocation to priesthood nor have I attended any special camps or retreats for vocations. Those were not in existence in those days. It was the Christian life lived at home that made my relationship with Jesus very intense and warm. I am sure the same is true of other seminarians too in those days.

I have to mention specially the role of my father when I have to speak about my vocation to priesthood. My father was the manager of a bank in Alleppey which was known as the State-aided Bank of Travancore, the only bank under the control of the State of Travancore. He was one of the very few in Alleppey at that time with a college degree. He went to the American College in Madurai, staffed by American missionary professors. It was a Protestant college as at that time no Catholic college was in existence in Travancore. It was a custom for him to take us always to the Sunday masses along with him. He would attend masses daily before he went to the office. If there were two masses, he would participate in both .Eucharist was every thing for him. The participation in the daily masses by an educated man like him and a manager of the Bank, a rare job in those days, was a source of inspiration not only to us, his children, but also to many in the parish.

In those days when nobody in our place had heard about the works of Bishop Fulton J. Sheen, he would buy the works of Sheen and read them in his spare time at home, especially on Sundays He had a collection of all the works of Sheen. He would ask me sometimes to read the books while he was relaxing in his reclining chair. I remember reading the “Peace of Soul”, a great work of Sheen of which I could not make head or tail in those days. The matter and the language of the book were beyond the comprehension of a high school student. Sheen was refuting all the current theories of Psychology and Psycho-analysis in that book. I still feel aghast at the fact that I could read aloud such books.

He would also read the Bible when all of us children are together and explain to us how the words of Jesus were guiding his life. When priests and other prominent visitors visit our house, there would be long discussions on matters of faith with them by my father.

Some of the rules he made us practice are still vivid in my mind. He would remind us to keep a respectable distance from priests as too much familiarity would make us lose reverence for priests. We could hear from our house which was across the road from the church his boisterous and friendly laughter and conversations with the parish priest of that time, Fr.Sebastian Cherussery ,on his return from the office at night.

That faith-filed atmosphere at home has definitely created in all of us a great attachment to our faith. Six of us ,boys , were growing up together but no discussion of priesthood ever came in our family life.

I was fortunate to get good teachers at Primary and High School levels. The Jesuit fathers at the High School and the sisters and the lay teachers at the Primary School were also responsible in molding our Christian faith .I have to mention my headmaster, Fr.Paul Kunnumkal, Fr.Joh Meempallikavil, Fr.M.C. Joseph etc as some of the great teachers at our High Scool. I remember very fondly the love and affection of Sr.Anonissamma and Sr.Espirit of the Adoration convent. Sr. Espirit taught a prayer that I have never forgotten. She told me to say a prayer :”Blessed Virgin Mary , pray for me”, whenever I passed before the grotto in front of the school play grounds.. In my life, thousands of times, I had to pass by the grotto and in all those occasions and even now if I pass by it, I say that prayer. Another prayer, also taught by one of my teachers at the Primary School, remains fresh in my mind even now. He told me and my friends that, before writing the answers in exams, to say a prayer to the Little Flower: “ Little Flower in this hour, show thy power.” I have said that prayer years later at my doctoral exams (Comprehensives) here in the U.S.

So, there in a nutshell is the story of my vocation. All those good and dedicated teachers and my parents were responsible in creating in me an ardent love for Jesus. It is that love that took me to the portals of a seminary.

After my results were known, I told my parents the desire to join the seminary. Even the parish priests had no idea that I would be joining the seminary. I had to make another decision whether to join the diocesan seminary or to the Society of Jesus to which all my priest- teachers belonged. I got the Rule Book of the Minor Seminary of Changanacherry and read everything in it. It was a small hard bound book, written in English. I got it from one of the seminarians in our parish. I decided after carefully reading the Rule book to join the diocesan seminary and went with one of the seminarians, now a priest(Fr.Matthew Mepreth) to meet the Bishop of Changancherry , Mar Mathew Kavukatt. He was surprised to see that I got very good marks in English and the congratulatory remarks that he made at that time still echo in my years.

I am thankful to the Lord for calling me to serve him and I am very happy to say that He was always present in my life. At every decisive moment in my academic and administrative life, he was there holding my hands and guiding me. What a joy it is to know the Lord and to feel His presence in one’s life. All the sacrifices and burdens of life appear nothing before the overwhelming mercy and compassion of the Lord. What prompted St. Paul to say : “ When Christ is with us, who can be against us”, is my feeling and I am sure the feelings of every one who commits himself to Christ.

The human dimension of love and companionship that one misses in priestly life is compensated by the love and affection of the people that they serve. In my life, because I was a teacher and an administrator, I was compensated by the love and affection of my students and colleagues.

The words of Thomas Merton, who is one of my very favorite authors and whose seminal work “The Seven Storey Mountain” that I read before joining the Major Seminary, are my own words at this fag end , when I see before me the evening sky splashed with the crimson radiance of the fading sun of my career and life:

“Let this be my only consolation, that wherever I am, You ,my Lord, are loved and praised. The trees indeed love you without knowing you. The tiger lilies and corn flowers are there, proclaiming that they love You, without being aware of Your presence. The beautiful dark clouds ride slowly across the sky musing on you like children who do not know what they are dreaming of, as they play. But in the midst of them all, I know You, and I know Your presence…..Only one thing I ask: that the memory of them should not make me afraid to receive into my heart the gift of love which you have placed in me.”

To those who aspire to follow Jesus , I have this message to convey: Fall in love with him and He will lead you to make the right step.