Thank you, 25

 Thank you-25

Aug. 3,Monday,2020
Today I started working on the Gospel readings. Even if I don't complete this before my birthday, I will work on it for a few months so that I can finish it before my next birthday.I will have something to do now.
I will work on this tonight and stop watching TV news.Mercy's case was handled by the doctor at Lourdes and all are feeling a sigh of relief.Thank you Lord for your mercy.
Frank's funeral took place last Friday in the U.S. Donna sent me an email detialing the last days of his life. he was taken to Dona's house after the death of their mother. He was paralysed from a motor bike accident. I will have to write to Donna.
August 6

Today I decided to spend a day in adoration in reparation for my sins. I will continue that every day.God has given me the opportunity to be here at the Mount  and the adoration is held  here. So I can spend my time without any additional effort for adoration.
Marymma has asked for some help and I am planning to send a cheque to Thomaskutty so that he can give it to her.
On Face Book, an exercise to strengthen lungs—5 deep breaths and after the sixth breath, cough and bend down for a few minutes—twice in the morning and twice at night. It is raining hard now , with storms.
There is no current here at this time—10.30pm.
Attended the  4.30pm the webinar of Xime with Manorama for half an hour and then went for  a haircut with Joshy.It has been a long  time since I stayed   at the Mount for such a long period. This  is because of the initiative of the Cardinal.He has insisted on my stay here.So it has given me a silent identity.I am made part of the community when I have no official role.Thank you ,Lord for your love and generosity.
Today I spent an hour before the Bl.Sacrament.I will do that everyday as a reparation for my sins.Lord, thank you for giving me this inspired thought.Even with no current, I can do some work on the computer!
Aug.9,Sunday
Today I said the mass and gave the homily. Fr.Muttamthottyil sang for the mass.All sisters expressed their appreciation individually.I thank the Lord for blessing me to give a short homily without any difficulty.
Today in the Deepika supplement there was an article on Thomas Thannikal and his research.He mentioned my name as one of his mentors. He and Benzy called me from LA.
There was a call from the Major Abp.He said he would include me in the e-news letter.Also he told Palakappally to include me  in all the POC meetings on Education.
All positive happenings today.
August 12,Wednesday
Tony is going ahead with preparing materials for the book to be published on my 80th birthday.Just a small booklet.
Today I sent an article to the Deepika on the new educational  policy.Called Jose Andrews and he said that he got my article.It will be published in a couple of days.He shared the pitiful state of affairs of the journalists at the Deepika.Thank you Lord, for giving me the confidence to write.
Aug.13,Thursday
Saw Fr.Puthiyadom here .He came to my room and shared the happenings taking place.Siby came here for a recommendation letter. Shared some of the rumors going around here.Will be going to Ekm for a short break and will be returning in the evening.
Aug.15,Saturday. Independence Day and the  Assumption.
My article came in the Deepika yesterday. Dr.E.M.Thomas called to offer his congratulations.Today, we had a common mass and flag hoisting.Cardinal asked me to give a short message.I referred to Nehru's speech—Tryst with Destiny.I felt happy at the publication of the article. I was able to put across my ideas on the new Educational policy.Today , just a quiet day. Will do some reading.
Aug.22,Saturday
It is one am.I am not getting any sleep and hence I am awake.I thought of typing out some of my reflections.It has been a long time since I used the computer.This morning,I will be offering my birthday mass-80th.The short booklet prepared by Tony and the Jeevan  Press got good comments from people in the US.Last night, I had a call from Fr. Thundathil and he mentioned that the booklet was very beautiful.Thank you,Lord.I have to spend more time with the Lord.That is the only thing I can do in my life.I should not waste any moment.I have to use all my available time to spread the love of Jesus.O,Jesus has been so good to me and he supported me and blessed me in all the difficult moments of my life.He forgave my sins.What He wants from me is to make His love known to people.
Aug.23,Sunday.
Yesterday said the mass in the morning. Abp. Kariyil gave a beautiful homily and mentioned my years at the college.The bouquet brought by Davis was given to me in the morning. There was a plethora of phone calls, non-stop as if the phone was thrown off the hook.The Deepika and the Manorama carried the reports.Manorama had a colour picture of mine.Sijo and Tony were behind this publicity. In the evening, at dinner, the Cardinal gave his talk, more on spirituality and intellectual charity.Spoke very elaborately.Did not mention my time at Chy.
I gave a short speech, starting with my going for seminary admission and meeting the Abp., and about the need to love all.Mentioned the incident buying the Cassette Recorder for   a priest  at the college and the consequent  change that was brought in him.Spoke of my father's influence,Kavukattu pithavu sending me for higher studie etcs.Quoted Keats.Balthazar's words, the need to maximize one's potentials.
Thank you Lord for the beautiful day.I never thought I would be able to celebrate it.
Aug 24,Monday
Yesterday too, received many calls because of the Manorama report.I am deeply thankful  to the Lord for His blessings and making the day a blessed one, with no untoward event.Thank you,Lord.
Aug.25,Tuesday
A few more calls from Annamma, Lillykutty and Xime staff.Did not do much reading. Tony did the publicity.He gave the report to Manorma ,Kottayam edition and it excited the alumni to get in touch with me.Thank God , it was over.I thought this would pass away silently because of the Covid.It got a good coverage.I am not worthy of it.So I have to be more attached to the Lord.My readings are poor these days.I have to start reading books.
Since I published my note on Priesthood in the booklet, the urge to write the homilies and to publish it has ceased.

There is a seating change in the Dining room.
Thank God, the 80th birthday was solemnly celebrated even without people. My family did not also get involved.Tony did a good job by mentioning the date first  and then preparing the booklet as  an editor.y.Write-ups by Santimon,etc came in the news.Sabu Jose spread the write up by Santimon.Thank You Lord for your love and kindness.I have to start reading spiritual books from tomorrow onward.
Aug.28,Friday.
Today when I went for the morning mass, Fr.Pittappilly told me about the quarantine for Fr.Kavil... because of his participation in a meeting at Muvattupuzha. Padamukal church is closed.Davis and the family in quarantine.
Today, I am mailing some of the booklets to the Bishops and to the colleges.
God has given me a wonderful opportunity to thank him. I have to use the time in praising Him.Will not waste my time.

I never thought I would be able to celebrate the 80th.By accident , it all occurred nicely.

Aug.29,Saturday:
Today is the feast of St. Euphrasia.Yesterday,Bp.Rajendran was here. I have not done anything specially.But I will use these days to prepare the address lists of Changnacherry priests and mail the booklets to them.At least it carries some thoughts on priesthood. Someone will read these.I cannot stop reading.I have to read and write.I will continue with the history of the Church and of the Crusades.Also will focus on the contribution of the Church to Science.
The consoling thing for A was that she did not trouble anybody because of her sickness.Within no time , her life was over.She was such an active person and never had any serious health problems.She had answers for everything.She was a source of support and strength.God bless her.

Aug.31,Monday.Onam.Today was Onam.I spent the day here and had Onam lunch with the priests here. I ate more rice and had two cups of payasaam.Went to Ekm to meet Kochayan and on the way back stopped at Josy's house. Didn't take much for supper except for a few curries.
Sept.5,Saturday
Yesterday went to Ekm.Had a haircut.Stopped to have a chat at home.Sajan called last night with regard to Alka's wedding.Sept.24th is her wedding.The preparations are all being made. Bp.Joy Alappat was invited to bless the marriage.
I am not doing much reading. I wrote a letter to Jancy and she replied with a Guru Vandanam as today is Teacher's Day.
Today's reading from the Gospel is Jesus' call to Mathew to follow him .Mathew readily followed him, giving up his job.Jesus eats with Mathew's friends who are considered sinners and tax collectors.
Sept.6,Elia,Moses-Sleeva liturgical season:
Lk ch.18—speaks of the blind man's cry and Jesus gives him the sight.I have to ask Jesus to give me the gift of strong attachment to Him and to control my desires.Lord, be with me.Heal me—Sana me.
Sept.14,Monday;
The beginning of the retreat after Lelia today.Fr.Mathew  Kakkattupillil VC  talking about the fatherhood of God, beginning his talk based on the creation account in the Bible.The mike and the tapering of his voice at the end of the sentence make it difficult to follow him totally. There is a lack of clear coherence in the development of his ideas. But it is OK. I have to spend more time thinking of the Fatherhood of God.
Today , I read in the You tube accounts of the talk of Pope Francis on confession.He says God forgets our sins after we make the confession.He really makes the sinner feel at peace in his heart.
He also says, if you can't find a priest, confess your sins to God.Very comforting are the words of the Pope on confession.
Today , there was some repair of the leak from the  bathtub's sides and hence the plumber was working in my room.After lunch, I went to Ekm and on the way gave my small phone to Biju to have its battery changed.The new battery costs Rs.2700.It was charged on my credit card.6 month's warranty.the Apple store is on SA Road near Vyttila.

 Sent a video message to Maria for Alka's wedding.
It is 11.30 pm and I don't feel sleepy because of the tapioca I have eaten at the supper.Tomorrow there is a con-celebration with the Cardinal.
Sept.15,Tuesday
First Talk at 9 a.m—mentions the ark of the covenant for the success of the Israelites.
We have to carry the ark of the covenant with us- Jesus , our Lord, his love.
Second talk—the prophet Elia who stole the glory of God.His sons lost the ark of the covenant.We have to have the zeal to preach the message of Jesus Christ.
I was feeling sleepy in the first talk.Usually I get sleepy in the morning.For the second talk, I changed my place towards the end of the bench so that I would not be  a cause for disturbance.
3p.m. Talk by the preacher  based on the Acts of the Apostles,ch.4.
The action of the Holy Spirit.Involves new births –new beginnings.Never be satisfied with the status quo.Be concerned about our mission---to spread the Word of God.
Aaron's rod is a rod of miracles, of creativity.
We had  adoration in the evening, then Lelia and night rest.
I tried to call George Vacha in the morning but did not get him.He called me later but I was in the chapel. I called him after my return but he was not there. Will try later.
I have to try to read the Bible , more spiritual books and make a deep change in my life.I still have my mission of making Jesus known and hence I should not rest on my thoughts that my time is over. No. Nothing is over .I have to work for Jesus until the last moment.I should not be thinking that there is nothing more to be done.I have to work for Jesus.That is the only way I can conquer my weaknesses and sins.I have to show that I love Jesus.So this is my resolution from the retreat---to work more, to read more .I should never be satisfied with the status quo.
Sept.16
morning talk—rival loyalty. Saul falling on the sword and dying.Double loyalty.
We should not be having this double loyalty.
Second talk...Samson and Delila...one weakness –Our weakness  affects our mission.
David and Uria. David is in serious sin.We too fall into situations like that. There are forces outside who are trying to destroy the Church.
Fallen people have become great saints.God is with them.We have to get up. I have to free myself from all the sinful passions.
Sin is part of our culture.It is easy to fall. We have to get up.
Third Talk—John's Gospel..Jesus asking Simon whether he loves him...
Building bonds, relationships, Love.
Sept.17,Thursday:
morning talk---have the manna with you just like the Israelites carried it in your Ark.
Our Manna—our God-experience—God intervening in our life which has become a saving moment for us.
For me, it has always been the way God saved me from very trying moments.
The permanent resident visa, the Car accident,  attaining important  positions, Ph.D.,Principal.VG etc.so many blessings to be thankful for.
God has protected me from my weak moments.I have to be eternally thankful.There is nothing more I need in my life. I have to live for Jesus in joy and peace and be satisfied with what I have and what I have received in life.
Had a confession.
Sept.18,FridayThe retreat was over by noon,Two morning talks on the seven last words of Jesus.Then, Adoration.
Fr.Joji offered the vote of thanks.
I gave  My books and the leaflets to Fr.Mathew.He said he had heard a lot about me.I congratulated him on his talks—on his method and his wide reading.
The retreat turned out to be good.

Sept.20,Sunday
A quiet day.The rain stopped now.I had a long conversation with George Sebastian Vempeny.After his talk was over, Dr.Joyson, diabetologist from Lourdes Hospital called at the suggestion of Vempeny.He was at the Sahrudaya Hostel, a classmate of Binu.He approved all the medicines that I am taking now.
He lives at Elamakara.Bp.Kallarackal has been his patient for the last 8 years.
Although I thought of spending more time in reading, the phone conversations took all the time in the morning.Will use the time to read the Bible in the afternoon.I should continue my reading and writing on spiritual topics.My aim now is to spread the word of the Lord.The Lord  was gracious to me.  He gave me time to change the course of my life and to be close to him.Thank you Lord.